Starting A New Life
by Lilly Demoncieur-Cullen
Summary: Three years after Cassidy is attacked by her ex-boyfriend, while Elliot was with her the purpetrator will be out of jail again. What will Cassie do about it, how does she feel about this, and most important how will she and Elliot get through this?
1. Prologue

**A/N: The characters and precinct don't belong to me, except for the places where Cassidy will live on her own. Her ex is also mine.**

 **Prologue**

 _'_ _Special victims unit, huh. Ah well let's do this. I thought when I came in to the precinct. With my box of personal items I walked towards the room where I needed to be, and it looked like I was the first one in. "Welcome to SVU, detective Sullivan. I'm captain Cragen. As you know we've started this unit seven years ago, the empty desk is yours, I think the others will come in at any moment." a bald men told me. "Thank you, captain Cragen. Please, just Cassidy or Cassie." I answered smiling, when the next one came in. "Good morning detective Stabler." the captain said, while I fixed up my desk. I looked up and saw a man that was just a little older than me that I recognized instantly, and I walked up smiling. "Hi Elliot. Nice to see you again." I said while I gave him a hug. "Hi Cassie, it's nice to see you too. How have you been?" he said, while he answered my hug. We shared how we were doing and why I had only been around with Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years Eve. I knew him for a while now through his wife Kathy, and I hoped we would be partners while I noticed he sat down at the desk opposite of mine. "It seems we're going to look at each other a lot." I said chuckling and he nodded. "It seems so, partner." he answered, while I looked around not noticing he called me his partner, and saw two other people walk in. The captain greeted them too, and told me there would be two others who would come in later. "Hi, I'm Olivia Benson." the woman said and held out her hand which I took. "Hi, Cassidy Sullivan, nice to meet you." I said, while we shook hands. I walked over to the older man and held out my hand. "Cassidy Sullivan, nice to meet you." I said once more, while the man took my hand and shook it, while he introduced himself as John Munch. A little while later I was settled down, and the last two joined us. We shook hands and I introduced myself to Odafin 'Fin' Tutuola and Brian Cassidy. The phone rang and Elliot answered it. It went so quickly I couldn't understand what was going on. "Let's go, partner." he said, stood and started walking out. "Cassie, you coming or what?" he asked and I got up as quickly as possible, I bumped my knee on the desk and walked out cursing. "Since when are we partners? I thought the captain was going to assign me one?" I asked, while we got in the car and got on our way to the crime scene. "He assigned you to be my partner the second he told you which desk you needed to take." he answered smiling, while I nodded.'_

 _I sighed, while thinking about my first time here, it was six years ago already. Ever since the start, Elliot and I were partners and they never took us apart. We went through hell and back again three years ago. He saved my life more than once, of course I returned the favor by saving his ass equally as much. But three years ago, it was different, it wasn't necessarily saving me, but he was there out cold on my kitchen floor by my ex boyfriend before he beat me up and raped me. After he was done and gone, I called 911 and asked for detectives Tutuola and Cassidy. Somehow I didn't want Olivia to find out, not that I didn't like or trusted her but we weren't friends either. After the whole ordeal Elliot's wife who was a long time friend of mine offered me a place to stay until I felt good enough to go back home again. I took the offer and two weeks later I was home again. I couldn't sleep properly without having nightmares._

 **A/N: Hope you liked it so far. It's my first try for a fanfic that isn't in the fantasy genre, so I hope I'm doing sort of a good job. For all the OxE lovers, sorry to dissapoint you, even though I'm one of those shippers too, I wanted to be my first SVU fanfic a ship between Elliot and my OC character. Let me know what you think by using the beautiful review button!**


	2. Chapter One: Double Trouble

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Dick Wolf, except the plot and Cassie.**

 **Chapter One: Double Trouble**

 **CPOV**

Sighing I walked into the room where we could take a nap when we pulled an all nighter and slumped down on one of the bunk beds. I did pull an all nighter and I was tired, or that's what I kept telling myself, I always slept here. Well not always, three years ago I slept a couple of months here with one nightmare after another, and it took El a lot of convincing me from his part to go home and sleep there. Finally I had given in, and got home. Eventually I decided to sleep at the precinct once more, since I didn't feel safe at home. A couple of months later, El took me apart from everybody in captain Cragen's office, to talk. I laid down on the bed and closed my eyes, hoping for a dreamless sleep. Since last month I started sleeping here again. Ironically enough, I did dream that night about the first conversation I had with El in captain Cragen's office.

 _"_ _You look like hell, Cassie!" Elliot said frowning. "Thanks for reminding me, El." I snapped, while I slumped down on my chair. "I know something's wrong, tell me." he demanded, while I shook my head. "It's nothing El. I just didn't sleep well." I replied, while he shook his head and sat down at his own desk. "Just so you know, I know your lying through your teeth, you look like this for days now. I'll be there for you, you know that right?" he said with a raised eyebrow. I sighed as a sign I gave up. "I know, El. But I just don't want to talk about. Not here that is." I said softly without looking at him. Suddenly Elliot got up and walked to captain Cragen's office and knocked. He got in and out in what was like a second, before he walked toward me and dragged me into captain Cragen's office. The captain left us alone and I looked at Elliot quizzically. "Please tell me, what's bothering you so much. You look like you haven't slept for days!" he started, with a worried look on his face. "I'm having nightmares ever since, El. I haven't had a good night's sleep for ages." I explained, while looking at my hands in my lap. "It's just… I feel like it's my own fault. If I hadn't broke up with him, then I wasn't going through all of this." I rambled on, while Elliot came over to me and put his arm around me. "You know it wasn't your fault, Cassie. Don't blame this on yourself. At least, that's what you always tell the victims that we talk too." he told me quietly. "I know, all the waiting for the trials is taking it's toll on me I guess." I sighed, while I looked at him. "When the trials start, you and Kathy will be there right?" I asked softly, while looking at my hands in my lap. "Of course we are, we won't let you down." he told me, while I stood up and gave him a hug. "Thanks, El. Before we go, I need to tell you something. For the last couple of months, I only go home to take a shower and change clothes and then come back here to sleep. The only one who knew about it until now, was captain Cragen." I confessed quietly, before letting him go and walking out of the office and to my desk._

I woke abruptly when a door closed with a loud bang, and looked around. For the first time in years I had a pleasant dream, well it wasn't a nightmare for once. I closed my eyes once more, and tried to get some more sleep. I heard someone slump down in the other bunk bed, but decided to ignore it, since I needed my sleep. After a while of tossing and turning I opened my eyes once more and looked to the bunk bed next to mine to see to my surprise that Elliot was laying on it. I grabbed my phone to check the time, only to see it was just three in the morning. Slowly I got out of the bed and sat down next to him. I knew he was still awake, even though he had his eyes shut. "El? What's up?" I asked quietly, while I laid my hand on his arm. He slowly opened his eyes and he looked like he was trying to figure out who was with him. "Cassie? What are you doing here?" he asked when he finally figured out it was me, who sat beside him. I ignored his question and asked him once more what was wrong. "I just had another fight with Kathy." he replied sighing, and I looked at him with narrowed eyes. "I don't believe it was just a fight, El. Normally you don't come over here to sleep when you had just a fight. It's three in the morning, for god sakes! What the hell did you do all this time? And I know all about it, since I've sleeping here for over a month. Don't try to get me home, I want to stay, at least tonight." I said, while he nodded. "Alright, alright. Let me get up first." he gave in, while I stood up and sat down on my own bed that I've been claiming since three years ago.

He sat down and looked at me. I could see a hint of pain in his expression. "I caught Kathy with someone else, when I got home. It wasn't the first time, though. So instead of yelling I just slammed the door and drove around aimlessly before I got back here." he explained sighing, while I nodded. "I never thought she would do something like that to you again, even though I was there two times when you caught her. Any chance the two of you talk about this again?" I asked, while he shook his head. "You can stay at my apartment for the time being, until you figured out what you're going to do about it." I offered, which he obviously declined. "I won't sleep there anyway, so it's completely unused." I pleaded, while I threw him my keys which landed next to him on the bed. "Thanks for the offer, but I'm not going to use your apartment, and let you stay here on your own." he declined once more and I sighed. "Okay, then we'll have to make it nice over here." I said with a little smile. "How do you do it, Cassie. Sleeping on this horrible bunk beds for days at a time." he asked smirking.

* * *

 **EPOV**

"Let's get some sleep, El." she replied, while she ignored my question. It was kind of ironic, that we both ended up sleeping at the precinct. Sure our situations were very different, and I knew what she was going through. In a couple of months, he would get out of jail and would be walking through the city again. Although, now I think about it she admitted to be sleeping here for over a month, I noticed something was wrong after the last night she had slept at home. When I asked her about it, she waved me off that it was nothing and told me she hadn't slept well. I looked over to her bed and saw she had turned her back to me, I knew she wasn't sleeping since I heard a couple of sniffles. Quietly I got up and sat down at the bedside where her face was. "W-w-what d-d-do y-you w-want, El?" she asked crying. "Why are you crying, Cassie." I asked her, while I helped her to get up in a sitting position. She pulled herself together and pulled her knees up to her chest. "He's going to be out of jail again, El." she whispered, while rocking back and forth. "Last time I slept home, the nightmares became worse. I'm scared as hell, El." she told me, and I nodded. I had known for weeks something was wrong, but I didn't ask any questions when she waved me off, now I felt guilty for not asking her more often about what was going on. I stood up and walked around the bed and sat down next to her, and put my arm around her to comfort her.

"As long as you're here, he can't get you. Hell he won't even get near you if you're with me. I promise you, Cassie." I said softly to her, while she laid her head on my shoulder and nodded, slowly falling asleep. I sat with her like that for a while and fell asleep for a while until someone closed the door with a loud bang. I jumped by the noise, mentally kicking myself for being startled in the first place. I looked over and saw that Cassie was still asleep and looked over to find the person who came in that loud, only to find the captain in front of the bed. I carefully laid her down on the bed and got up. "Morning captain Cragen." I said, while he only nodded. He beckoned me to follow him, to get to his office. "You're early Elliot. Have you slept here?" he asked and I nodded. I explained what happened last night, and told him why I was in the same bed as Cassidy was. "I understand, Elliot. She's going through a rough time. But she has to go home eventually, she can't stay here forever. You can't stay here forever either." he said, and I nodded. "Actually captain, I'm already looking for another place to live with plenty of room to have the kids staying over for one or two nights." I replied, while I looked at him. "The two of you are going to take a couple of days off you both need it. It's not a question, but an order. Get back to the room and wait for Cassidy to wake up." the captain said, while I nodded and left his office and walked to the room where we could sleep. Once I got in I saw Cassie waking up. "Good morning sleepy head." I said smiling, while she very maturely stuck out her tongue at me. "Did you even sleep, El?" she asked with a smirk on her face. "For a little while, after you fell asleep. Captain Cragen woke me up when he came bursting in. I jumped, I was surprised you slept through the whole ordeal, though." I told her. "What did the captain want from you?" she asked, and I told her why he came in. Reluctantly she got up and sighed. When we got out of the room she got called into the captain's office, before she got in she gave me a puzzled gaze. I shrugged, and walked over to my own desk. "You too, Elliot." the captain called, and I got up.

When we both were in his office I wondered what he wanted now. "I take it you told Cassidy about our conversation earlier?" he started, while I gave him a quick nod. "I hope you don't take it as an offence that I give you some time to yourself Cassidy, but I thought you needed it. I know you don't want to go home, and I can understand completely after what happened but you can't do this much longer. Maybe you should join Elliot in his search for a new place to live. Start something new in a new place." he told her, while she only nodded. "Maybe, but I don't know if I can, captain." she replied quietly. "Just think about it. That's all I ask." he said, while she nodded once more. "Why did I need to come in, captain?" I asked him, while he looked at me. "I asked him to call you in, El." Cassie said, and I looked at her quizzically. "She will explain later. I'll see the both of you in a couple of days." captain Cragen said, and we both left his office figuring out what to do with our free time. "So, what are you up to today?" I asked her, while we were walking to the car. "I don't know. Maybe I just go home and think about what Cragen said. I mean, I could move to another apartment you know. Just to start something new in a new place." she replied, with a little smile on her face. The ride was quiet for a while. "Please don't drop me off at home. I think I'll go crazy if I'm in there for the whole couple of days off." she told me and I raised an eyebrow wondering why she said that. "If you don't want to be home alone, I could join you. Maybe you could help me finding a place of my own?" I offered, and she nodded in reply.

* * *

 **CPOV**

"I think I could help you. Maybe we have some fun looking for apartments and houses." I answered smiling. "But I first need a little bit of time to take a shower. But of course you can just wait in the living room." I added quietly. "Okay, I will. Take as long as you need." he replied and I nodded. "Why did you ask Cragen to call me into his office, when he wanted to talk to you?" he asked me, while I turned my head to the window. "I don't know, but somehow I had the awkward feeling I needed my friend to be me with me in there. But it turned out it wasn't necessary in the end. Even though it wasn't necessary I was glad you were in there with me." I replied while I looked out the window, feeling some stray tears rolling down my cheeks. "I understand, we've been friends for a while before you started here and became my partner. I'll be there for you, whenever you need me to be." he said, and I could hear the smile in his voice, while more tears rolled down my face. The car stopped, and I got out and walked to the building, with Elliot on my tail. As he walked up beside me I did my best to hide my tears, but of course he had to notice it. "What's wrong, Cassie?" he asked, and I started to walk faster, and before I knew it I was running, but before I could reach my door Elliot caught up with me and caught my arm. "Let go of me!" I hissed and jerked my arm out of his hands. "Please tell me why you're crying, I rather see you laughing sweetie." he said defeated, while I shrugged and unlocked my door, before letting him in and locking my door. "I'm exhausted, this whole thing that happened three years ago is taking it's toll on me. And then the knowledge he's getting out in a couple of months, it's just too much to handle on my own." I said, while he put his arms around me and comforted me until I stopped crying.

"Thanks, El. I think I'll go and take a quick shower so we can go on the hunt for a new place for you and a new one for me." I said and walked into my bedroom, took some clothes out of my closet and got into the bathroom. I showered quickly and took a towel to dry myself off and got into sweatpants and a tank top. I brushed my hair and it put in a ponytail and got out. "I don't know if you brought clothes with you, but you can use the shower if you want to." I said, while I sat down next to him on the couch. "I didn't take the time to take some clothes, I was planning on going to the house to pick some up later. But I will take on your offer to use the shower." he said, while he got up and walked into the bathroom. "I'll get you some towels." I said, while I got up to get some towels. When I had the towels I walked into the bathroom, to put them down only to bump into Elliot who just got out of his shirt and pants. "I'm sorry!" I exclaimed and almost ran out of the bathroom in embarrassment. I slumped down on my couch and sighed, while I laid down to rest a little. I must have dozed off, since I didn't notice that Elliot came back in until he plopped down on the couch. I jumped up and looked up. "Oh, you're done already!" I said startled, while I took in his appearance and noticed he didn't had his shirt on. "What happened to your shirt?" I asked, while I realized I was still staring at his bare chest, I shook my head to snap out of it and focused on my hands. "I put it to close to the shower, I think. When I came out it was all wet." he replied sheepishly, while I started to feel a little uncomfortable. "I'll throw it in the dryer. It will be dry soon." I said, while I got up and walked into the bathroom and took his shirt. I walked to the laundry room and threw his shirt in the dryer and turned it on, while I walked back into the living room. "I wished I could offer you something to eat. But unfortunately I can only offer you coffee. I really need to go to the grocery store." I said, while I felt my cheeks turn red once more since Elliot was still shirtless. "We can pick up groceries after I picked up my clothes, and after that we're going on the hunt for my new place and yours, okay?" he asked me, while I smiled and got myself a cup of coffee. "That sounds good to me. Want some?" I asked, while pointing to the cup of coffee in my hand, while he nodded in reply. "It's on the kitchen bar, El." I said, while turning around and made another cup of coffee.

The dryer took too long for my liking, but I had to deal with it for now. "I know it sounds stupid, right now. But I kind of feel a little uncomfortable at the moment." I admitted blushing. "Why? It's not like you never saw me like this before." he asked with a smirk. "I know, but it's kind of different now and you know it, El. I mean, it feels a little awkward. It's not meant to offend you, you know that right?" I explained, while he smiled and nodded. "I know, and I didn't take it offensive." he said smiling, while I nodded. "It's especially awkward since I literally bumped into you when you were only in boxers, just twenty minutes ago." I said, while I was still blushing. Elliot started laughing, and gave me a wink. "Just admit it, you liked seeing me that way." he said playfully while he was still laughing, which made me laugh too. "Maybe, maybe not." I retorted, while the dryer started beeping. I got up from my stool and ran into the laundry room, took his shirt out and walked back into the kitchen area. "Here you go, El." I said while I threw his shirt at him, which he caught easily. "Thanks, Cassie. I owe you." he said with a smile on his face and put on his shirt.

"Let's go and get my clothes." he said, and I nodded. It seemed he had forgotten I locked the door, since he was trying to open it. "Um, El? It's locked, bad habit of mine." I said apologetic, while he smiled at me. "I knew that." he replied sheepishly, and unlocked the door, while I picked up my keys and a hooded sweatshirt and closed the door behind me, locking it. "So… Why are you picking up your clothes now, when Kathy isn't home?" I asked, mentally slapping myself on my forehead for being that stupid. "I thought it was for the best if I didn't saw her after last night. I'm still angry about it and I don't want to do anything stupid." he explained and I nodded. "Are you taking me with you only because I don't like to be home alone, or would you decide to take me with you even if I did like being home alone?" I asked, just to be sure I wasn't a burden. "Of course I would have taken you with me if you did like to be alone. Even if Kathy was at home I would take you, you know how to keep me calm when needed." he said, and I let out a sigh of relieve. "I just don't want to be a burden on you, you know. You're going through a tough time and I just want to make sure I'm not bothering you." I explained, when he started laughing again. "You're not bothering me. We both are going through a rough time right now. But we have each others back at any time. And how tough this is going to be, I'll be there for you and I know you're trying to be there for me and that's all I need to know." he said while giving me a quick gaze. "I know, I'll do my best to be there for you. And I'm glad I can help you. You could crash on my couch if you want for as long as you need to." I offered, while he nodded.

* * *

 **EPOV**

"Thanks, I wasn't planning on sleeping at a crappy motel anyway." I said chuckling, while the rest of the drive was made in silence. While we pulled up at the driveway of the now empty house, I took a glance at her, she seemed off. "We're here, are you coming? I could need a hand with packing my clothes." I said, and she jumped out of her thoughts. "Of course, let's go." she replied, and got out of the car. Together we walked into the house, and started packing my clothes in a large suitcase. "To refer back to what you admitted earlier. You just have to get used to it, if I'm crashing on your couch." I said playfully, while smiling at her. Of course our relationship was purely platonic, but I liked Cassie as a friend and maybe a little more. "Very funny, Stabler. You're required to wear a shirt at all times from now on." she replied laughing, while throwing a couple of socks at me. "You're packing your underwear yourself, captain underpants. I'm not going in that drawer." she shot at me, while I chuckled. "That's fine by me, care bear." I replied, and before we knew it we were done packing. When we came down the stairs I heard the door open and close, I sighed and walked down with my suitcase, only to be greeted by Kathy. "Elliot, you came home." she said, and I didn't look at her. "Only to pack my clothes. I'm moving out, so you can enjoy your time with the new man in your life." I replied, feeling the anger bubbling in my stomach. Cassie must have heard the venom in my voice, since she carefully put her hand on my shoulder and stepped down from the last stair. I looked at her with a small smile, when Kathy noticed her. "Cassie, how nice to see you again. How are you doing?" she asked her, while she went up to Cassie and hugged her. "To circumstances I'm fine." she replied with a smile.

"We should go. Work and all." I said somewhat awkward, and started walking to the door. "Yeah, we should. Bye Kathy, have a nice day." Cassie bid her goodbye politely and followed me, while I let her out. I just wanted to step outside, when Kathy grabbed my arm. "Why are you leaving? Can't we just try, for the kids." she pleaded, while I shook my head. "No, I'm done trying. Last night, wasn't the first time you cheated on me and I caught you." I replied angry, pulled my arm out of her grip and walked outside. When I got to the car, I threw in my suitcase and got in while Cassie followed my lead. "Is this really what you want, El?" Cassie asked me, with an apologetic look on her face. "Let's get the groceries and we talk about it when we're back at your place okay?" I replied, and she nodded. "You sure, you're comfortable with me crashing at your place?" I asked, when we arrived at the grocery store. "Of course! You need a place to stay. Kathy's obviously acting like nothing happened or she just ignored the suitcase at first, until we headed out." she said, while she got out of the car. I followed her into the store and together we filled the shopping cart with food and drinks, for the rest of the week. "Those groceries are on me, since I'm crashing at your place." I said with a smile, in a tone that gave away that arguing about it wasn't going to happen. She gave in, with a sigh and I smiled in triumph. Happily chatting we walked out of the store and placed the groceries in the trunk and headed back to Cassie's place. After a silent drive we arrived at her place and got in. I noticed she locked the door immediately, while I looked at her it was obvious she was afraid he got inside. "You don't have to lock that door while I'm here, you know. He's not coming near you, and if he wants to, he has to get through me first." I said with a smile, while I knew that she already knew I would protect her in any way possible. "I know, routine habit. Ever since it happened I started doing that." she replied smiling, but didn't unlock the door. If she felt more safe that way, I just needed to get used to it.

After we had unpacked the groceries, we searched through the newspapers to find a place she or I could live in, but found nothing. Cassie pulled out her laptop and started searching online for some real estate agents, in the meantime I called a lawyer to get an appointment to start the divorce procedure. We made an appointment for tomorrow morning at eleven. I plopped down next to her at the couch and looked over her shoulder while she did the Google searches. "You promised me we would talk about what I asked you earlier on our drive to the grocery store." she started carefully and I sighed. "I did. I'm sure I want this. Over the last three years I caught her cheating on me several times, with the same guy. Last night, I decided it was over and done with. I'm meeting my lawyer tomorrow morning to get the procedure started." I told her, and I looked at her and caught her eye. She put her laptop on the coffee table and turned to me. "I never thought Kathy to be like that, those times I was there when you caught her I thought it was just a mistake she made and she wouldn't do it again. I know she's my friend, but over the years you and I are working together our friendship grew stronger, especially after what happened three years ago. And Kathy and I… I don't know… Our friendship wasn't that strong I guess. It's not that I hate her for what she did to you, I could never hate her. But that doesn't mean I approve of what she did. She hurt you, and I won't let that happen again." she said, and I nodded. We gave up on our search for real estate agents and just talked, until it was time for dinner.

* * *

 **CPOV**

"I'll cook. How about Italian?" Elliot asked me smiling, while I was flipping through channels. "Sounds good, need help finding stuff?" I replied, and settled for some real life soap and stood up. I got into the kitchen and gave Elliot the supplies he needed, while I took one of the knives and started chopping up the mushrooms for the sauce. "Get out of my kitchen, shorty. I'm the chef tonight." he said playfully, while he took the knive out of my hands and took over the chopping. I sat down on one of the bar stools and just watched him work his way around the kitchen. "I didn't know you could cook." I stated smiling, enjoying watching him while he was cooking. "Of course I can. But it never came up during conversation, so I never mentioned it." he stated like it was obvious, while brushing my nose with his finger. I rolled my eyes at him and wiped off my nose. "Do you even know how to cook?" he asked eventually. "What do you think, egghead. Of course I can cook. You know that I was the one who needed to cook at home. And do all the other household chores. It wasn't like I had a better childhood than you did and we both know that. You're an ass for bringing that up!" I stated, irritated that I had to bring up my childhood once more with Elliot. He turned around at my tone and looked at me apologetically. I huffed at him and stood up, and walked to the living room to flip through some channels again, trying to find something good to watch. While Elliot was rummaging through my kitchen I got into my own thoughts, until he startled me when he plopped down next to me. I focused my gaze on the television screen. I was still annoyed at Elliot for bringing up my childhood, and I was about to let him have it.

We sat in silence and ate dinner in silence. After dinner I did the dishes and popped in a movie, still giving Elliot the silent treatment. Halfway through the movie I heard him sigh. "Cassie, please don't do this. I'm sorry for bringing that up. I shouldn't have, you told me a couple of years ago. And I promised you to never bring it up again, and I broke my promise. Please forgive me." he said and I could hear he was sincere about it. I gave him a small smile while I looked up at him. "Only if you admit you're an ass for bringing that up." I said, while I gave him a stern look and heard him sigh. "I admit I was an ass for bringing that up again." he gave in and I smiled in triumph. "I'm sorry for the silent treatment, you didn't deserve that. Not with what you're going through right now." I said smiling, while I scooted over and gave him a hug which he returned. "You in for another movie?" I asked with a smile. "Yeah, let me see what you have." he answered and got up to look in my movie rack to pick out a movie. He popped in the movie, and to my surprise he choose one of the animation movies I liked. "Seriously, El? Ice Age?" I asked chuckling, while looked at me quizzically. "I didn't thought you liked that movie." I said with a shrug. "I regularly watched it with the twins." he said smiling, while I laughed. "I never thought you would actually pay attention to the movie." I admitted laughing, while I watched the movie. "I take it you like the movie, since it was in your movie rack after all." he stated, and focused his gaze to the movie. "I love it. It's just hilarious and I have seen it multiple times. I gives me a good laugh on the really bad days, you know." I explained with a shrug, while he nodded. I looked at him for a while and found he was watching the movie intently, chuckling I returned my focus to the movie. After the movie was done, Elliot jumped up and picked another movie, this time it was an older movie, which I liked.

I had a blast with movie night, but when I woke up the next morning I couldn't remember how I ended up in my bedroom. I knew I didn't have any alcoholic drinks at all last night. I slowly got out of bed picked out some nice clothes out of my closet and took a quick shower. When I was ready, I silently walked into the kitchen and made two cups of coffee. "Good morning sunshine!" I heard from behind me and I jumped. "Morning El." I replied, while I turned around only to bump into him again. "Sorry. I didn't realize you were standing there. I took in his appearance, and pushed him out of my way. "Sorry, it wasn't my intention to scare you." he apologized, while he sat down next to me. "You really should start wearing any type of clothing when you're staying here. How much I appreciate your appearance, it's just weird having you walking around in only a boxer short or sweatpants in my house." I stated chuckling, and took a sip of my coffee. "I'll try to remember that request. How did you sleep anyway?" he asked with a smile, while I looked up at him. "Great actually, I was only wondering how I ended up in bed. I can't remember going to bed." I replied, while I shrugged. He looked at me and gave me a small smile. "Thirty minutes into the last movie I popped in you fell asleep, so I brought you to bed, and got back to the living room to sleep myself." he answered while I nodded.

* * *

 **EPOV**

After I explained to her how she ended up in bed, I drained my cup of coffee and got up. I opened my suitcase and took out some clothes, and dressed. "You're coming with me right? To the appointment with my lawyer, I mean?" I asked her, while she walked into the living smiling at me. "If you want me to, I will." she replied, while she plopped down on the couch. "Yeah, I could use some company while driving. It's fun having you around to talk to." I admitted, while I closed my suitcase and sat down next to her. She handed me another cup of coffee. A little later it was time to go, we got in the car and drove in silence until we were nearly there. "I think it's for the best if I just stay in the waiting room." she said softly, while I drove up to the parking lot and parked the car. "You sure you want to do that? I don't know how long it will take, and I don't want you to get bored by sitting there doing nothing." I replied smiling, while we both got out of the car and walked to the office. "Yeah, I'm sure. I just don't want them to think you're divorcing Kathy because of me." she suddenly said before walking into the office. "I understand, but even if you were coming in with me, I would tell my lawyer I'm divorcing her because of adultery. And because of all the fighting, we did the last four years." I said, while I stopped walking. "But of course there are always people that make their own assumptions. But we both know why I'm doing this. Let's get in before I'm late for my appointment." I added, and started walking again. "I know, El. But it's not usual that a man takes a female friend with him, when he's filing for divorce. You know how it goes." she said, while she followed me in. I got to the reception desk and told the woman behind the desk I had an appointment with mister Matthews, and she nodded while calling him to tell him his appointment had arrived. I noticed her staring at me, before she gave Cassidy some death glares, which Cassidy obviously noticed.

I sat down next to Cassidy and waited for mister Matthews to pick me up while the receptionist was still staring us, mixed with death glares for Cassidy. "Someone has some trouble in her love life." Cassidy mumbled softly to me, while she shot the woman a death glare of her own. "You noticed, huh." I replied, while she nodded smiling. "It's pretty obvious what she thinks of me, El. And how she was ogling you it's totally obvious how she thinks about you too." she said with a grimace on her face. I wanted to reply when my lawyer came in. "Mister Stabler, you can come with me. Are you coming with him, miss?" mister Matthews asked, while Cassidy shook her head. "I'm just here for moral support." she said with a little smile, while I nodded in agreement. I got up and followed the man into his office and sat down. "So tell me, mister Stabler, how can I help you?" the man asked, while I looked at him. "Call me Elliot please. I want to divorce. Over the last three years I caught my wife multiple times with another man and two nights ago was the last straw. In the past four years we were fighting a lot and that just added to the fuel." I replied, while the man nodded. I had noticed at the waiting room how he was staring at Cassidy, and he had probably made his own assumptions. "I can do that. I'll start with the papers, when they're ready I'll send them to you so you can sign them, before you give them to your spouse. Just wondering, that girl in the waiting room who was with you, she doesn't have anything to do with your decision right?" he replied, while I looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "No, she doesn't. She's my partner at work and a good friend of me and my soon to be ex-wife." I replied, with a little smile on my face. "Okay, the only thing I need are your contact details and where to send the papers, Elliot." he said, while he gave me apologetic look. I gave him my contact details and gave him Cassidy's address to send the papers to. He nodded at me and stood and I followed his lead. "Thank you, mister Matthews." I said, while shaking his hand and got out. I picked up Cassidy and we left the building and got into the car to drive back home. "I had lovely talk with the receptionist." Cassidy said with an evil smirk on her face, while I looked at her. "What did you do?" I asked her with a raised eyebrow. "Oh, I just made it clear enough for her that I didn't appreciate the death glares she was giving me for no reason, and I may have mentioned you were taken." she with an innocent smile on her face. "You may have mentioned what?" I asked her and she just smiled. "Well, you're basically still married to Kathy, so you're taken." she stated the obvious laughing. "How did she react to that?" I asked, and a wicked smile on her face appeared. "Oh god, I think I don't want to know, huh?" I added, while she nodded. "Oh, believe me you want to know. She started laughing like a maniac, it was pretty scary though. When she was done laughing, she simply stated she would get you anyway, and that she would make sure I wasn't a problem anymore. That was my cue to start laughing at her, and I made it clear that, that wasn't going to happen since you would never dump your best friend for some weird chick." she told me laughing, which made me laugh too. "She really thought you're my girlfriend, didn't she?" I asked, while she nodded. "Oh, she did. And my reactions didn't deny that actually. But hey, I just wanted to have some fun with that witch and it worked out perfectly." she said smiling, while I nodded and we walked out of the building.

"I guess you were right about people assuming you're my girlfriend and that's the reason for filing for divorce." I said sighing. She looked up at me with a raised eyebrow. "Why are you telling me this?" she asked, still looking quizzically at me. "My lawyer thought I'm divorcing Kathy because of you, but I explained we're just partners at work, and that you're my friend as well as Kathy's. That made him shut up about it." I explained her, while I gave her a quick glance. "I thought he was a creep, to be honest. The way he was staring at me, it was just creepy." she admitted after a little while and a shiver ran through her body. I gave her another quick glance and turned into the parking garage that was by her building and parked the car. "He was staring quite intently at you, I have to admit that. Actually, I didn't like the look on his face at all." I told her, while she nodded and I started wondering if she ever got into another relationship after what happened. She never mentioned it to me, nor to Kathy as far as I knew. Normally she told me or Kathy everything, and wouldn't keep any secrets about her love life or other things in life. We both got out of the car and walked into her building. Walking up the stairs I observed her movements, they were different since everything happened. She was careful, alert, always looking around, like someone was going to jump her at any moment even in her own home she was like that. "Stop staring at me like that, El. It's pretty annoying." she stated, while I shook my head and locked my eyes with hers. "I shouldn't have done that. But I couldn't help but observing your movements." I admitted, while she opened the door and walked in, while I followed her. "So tell me, what were you observing?" she snapped at me, while she immediately plopped down at the couch. I closed the door and walked into the living room, to sit down next to her. "Ever since that happened to you, your movements are different. You're more careful, more alert. It's like you're expecting someone to jump at you any moment, even if you're behind closed doors. Of course I understand where you're coming from and why you're doing this, but this isn't the Cassidy I'm used to." I admitted, while I watched her picking up her laptop. "I know I've changed. And I'm sorry for snapping at you like that. But I have to admit you're not the first one to observe this. Fin did too, when you left the precinct a couple of days ago he told me sort of the same thing you did, but in his own words. He promised me to have my back at any time, and that he was looking out for me." she told me with a little smile, while browsing the internet looking for real estate agencies.

"You want me out of here that soon?" I asked playfully, while I looked over her shoulder to her findings and poking her sides. She started laughing, and looked up at me. "Cut it out, El. I don't want my laptop to drop onto the floor. Was there anything in the papers?" she asked, while I shook my head. "Nothing, or too small to hold six people in separate bedrooms. Even nothing you would like." I said, while I was still looking at the screen over her shoulder. "So, I guess we're looking for something that holds at least five to six bedrooms, and is in your price range. I think you have to look at houses that are up for sale. Rentable houses don't have much space." she said and I nodded, suddenly my phone rang. "Kathy, what do you want?" I answered my phone, while she started explaining why she called. "Okay. Bye." I answered and hang up, while I plopped down next to Cassidy. "Stop the search, Kathy just called, to tell me she's moving out. She seemed to have found another place with enough space to hold her the kids and her boyfriend, so I can stay at the house. She would be out by the weekend, so after the weekend you've got your place back to your own." I told her with a little smile, while she nodded but didn't stop searching. "What's the plan with the divorce papers?" she asked, while she turned to me. "I gave your address so they would be arriving here for me to sign them, after that I'll go to Kathy's work and drop them off so she can sign them and send them back to mister Matthews." I told her, and she gave me a little smile. I was still wondering about her love life, but I didn't know if I could ask her about it, without giving her the wrong idea. _Maybe I just should ask her about it, I know she would tell me the truth anyways._ ran through my mind. "Cassie, can I ask you something private?" I started, while she looked at me. "You can, you know that." she replied, while I thought about how to ask her. "Maybe it's a stupid question, but I was wondering… If you had another boyfriend, after everything what happened three years ago? Since you never spoke about it after that to me or to Kathy." I asked and I observed her cheeks flushing bright red. "Ever since what happened, I haven't had another boyfriend. Hell, I even didn't go on a date that didn't end up horrible. I know not every guy is the same, but I'm scared to death he will ruin it. And maybe I have a little trust issue when it comes to men I don't know." she admitted, while she stood up and walked into her bedroom. I watched her go, and decided to watch some television but I knew she wasn't telling me everything.

* * *

 **CPOV**

After I admitted to Elliot I didn't have any relationship after everything that happened I put away my laptop and fled into my bedroom, as soon as I hit my pillow I started crying, feeling guilty for not being completely honest with him. I knew it was nothing to be ashamed of, and I had a reason to distrust strange men but I just couldn't admit to my best friend I haven't had a date for over three years. I knew why I hadn't dated, but I couldn't tell him, that would make things difficult and awkward. I didn't know for how long I was laying there but I was still crying when I felt Elliot sit down next to me on the bed. He helped me up and took me in his arms. "Sshh, don't cry sweetie. It will be alright, you will be okay. I was wrong for asking that." he whispered, while I shook my head and he pulled me on his lap. He didn't have to feel this way, like it was his fault I was crying. When I calmed down, I looked up at him. "It wasn't your fault, El. We're best friends you shouldn't have to be careful with what you're asking me. I just felt embarrassed about it, it's kind of stupid anyway." I said to him, while he was still holding me. I put my arms around his neck and gave him a hug, and a little kiss on his cheek. "What did I do to earn that?" he asked smiling at me, while he kept me in his arms. "I just wanted to thank you, for being there for me and helping me dealing with all of this." I whispered, while I let him go and smiled at him. "I actually know, you're hiding something from me Cassie. You don't have to tell me about it, but I just want you to know that I'll figure it out anyway." he said with a small smile and I felt my cheeks turning red. "Let's fix some dinner." I said to change the subject, while I tried to stand up, but Elliot tightened his grip on me. "No changing subjects, missy. I noticed those red cheeks." he said, while he held me tighter. "I'm not going to walk away from my house." I joked, and his grip got stronger. "Or at least not until I found something else." I mumbled quietly. "I know you won't. But I'll be holding you hostage until you tell me just a little bit more about what you're hiding from me." he said, and I sighed. "El, I need to breathe, you know." I said, while I tried to wriggle out of his grip. "But I'll tell you if you let me go, or at least loosen that grip a little." I said with a sigh, but he didn't loosen up his grip. _Hopefully he will loosen up a little when I tell him something_ I thought. "I haven't had a date for over three years, actually." I said, and all of a sudden I was free to go, or at least I thought so, because his arms were around me again quicker than I could move and pretty tight as well. "Why didn't you tell me that straight away?" he asked me and I sighed. "Because, there's a reason I don't date anyone and what happened three years ago and him getting out in a couple of months are not the main reason for it." I said, while I tried to get into a more comfy position on his lap so I could look at him. "El, a little help please." I demanded, and he put me into a more comfy position and I thanked him with a smile. "Can you tell me the main reason?" he asked, and I shook my head. The longer he held me like this, the more uncomfortable I felt but on the other hand I also felt safer than ever. "I can't, it would make things difficult and awkward." I said, while I felt a stray tear rolling down my cheeks.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you into telling it. Am I hurting you?" he asked, and I nodded, it started to hurt a little bit. "A little bit. It wouldn't be a bad idea to check for bruises later tonight or tomorrow morning. You know I bruise easily." I replied, still looking anxiously at him. I knew he still wanted to know why I didn't want to date. "Can you at least give me a hint?" he asked and I just sighed. "Why don't we just eat something, and forget about it." I suggested, while he looked at me and recognized the look on my face. "Okay, let's grab a bite to eat. But I can't just forget about this." he said softly, while he looked at me apologetically. "Alright, alright then we don't forget about it, but can we just not talk about it anymore?" I asked, while he nodded. "For now I won't ask you about it anymore." he said and I smiled a little through my tears while he wiped away my tears with his thumb. "Time for dinner? But I have to admit I don't feel like cooking. Maybe ordering a pizza or something like that?" I said, while I fought the urge to blurt out more than I wanted. "Let's order some pizza. I don't feel like cooking either." he said and I tried to get up. "El, to order pizza I need my phone." I said laughing, while I tried to get out of his grip I heard him sigh but he let me go. "Thank you, El. What kind of pizza you want? Or do you want to share one? Then I'll order a large one." I asked, before I left the bedroom. "Pepperoni. If you like pepperoni that is." he answered, while he followed my lead and we got into the living room. "Pepperoni is fine. I'll order a large one." I said, while I picked up my phone and dialed the number. "It's Cassidy Sullivan speaking. I want to order a large pepperoni pizza." I said, while the girl on took my order and asked for my address. I gave them my address and she gave me a time limit when my order should arrive. "Thanks! Bye." I hang up the phone and walked over to the desk where I kept my wallet and put out some money. "It should take about forty five minutes." I said, while I walked back to the couch and felt Elliot take my hand and pull me on his lap again.

"El, I just want to sit down next to you." I said in a serious tone, while I looked at him anxiously. "I just want to know one more thing." he said, and I sighed. "What do you want to know now?" I asked, before I tried to get up, to get us something to drink, when he tightened his grip on me once more. "Okay, El. Stop it. You're making me uncomfortable now." I said a little afraid. How safe I felt, I just wanted to get something to drink so I just kept trying, but the more I tried how tighter and more painful his grip got. "I just wanted to know how you feel while we're sitting like this." he said, while I started blushing furiously. "It's a little weird, but comfortable." I said, avoiding the safe part perfectly. "I think you're hiding something from me again." he said while he wiggled his eyebrows. I grumbled and tried to get up. "Elliot, let go of me or I won't be serving you any beer tonight!" I said and he let go instantly. "See, you're hiding something." he said, while I huffed and walked toward the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. When I got out two beers I closed the refrigerator. "Sorry, Cassie." a voice came from close behind which made me jumped and drop the bottles of beer, but before they could reach the floor two hands shot out and caught them. "Jesus El! Stop sneaking up on me like that or I'll end up having a heart attack!" I exclaimed, while looking at him and swiftly walked around him and took a seat at one of the stools at the kitchen bar. I jumped when the bell rang, and made a move to get up. "I'll get it." he said, while I watched him go I was actually worrying about why I was hiding things from him. "There's money on the desk." I said, while I waited in silence and opened my beer and took a sip. I silently got of my stool and sneaked into the hallway and stopped closely behind Elliot. I was planning on giving him the same thing he gave me two times already. He closed the door, and turned around and bumping into me. "Cassie! When did you get here?" he asked with his voice being an octave higher than it normally was. "I decided it was time for payback." I said laughing, walking away, while doing some sort of victory dance.

* * *

 **EPOV**

"Okay, Okay I get it. I'll try to give up on the sneaking up on you." I said, laughing and put down the pizza box on the kitchen bar. My stomach growling, I eagerly opened the box and took a slice, while Cassidy followed my lead and did the same. "Earlier, on the couch, you really made things difficult for me, El." she started, while I looked at her. "You were pushing me again to tell you things I can't tell you, just like in the bedroom. If you're going to do this all the time, I think it's for the best you leave or that I'm going to stay at the precinct again." she told me, while I looked at her in shock. It actually scared me when she said that and I started to get a little scared of losing her as a friend. "I'm sorry, I really am. I won't do it again. I don't want to lose you as a friend." I said and I was sincere about this, I really didn't want to lose her in any way. "That's why I can't tell you the main reason of my no dating policy." she said, and I thought about it for a second and then it hit me and my jaw dropped to the floor. "I think I get it." I said, and she looked at me in shock but didn't make a move to reply and finished her slice of pizza and got up, while she picked up the pizza box and her bottle of beer, nodding with her head toward the living room. She put down the items on the coffee table before picking up another slice and sat down on the couch giving me a small smile. When I sat down I noticed she sat a little further away from me than usual, and I watched her finishing up her slice. Before I got another slice myself I noticed she had her arms around her stomach, and I wondered what was wrong. "Stomach ache?" I asked interested, while she looked up at me and I noticed a flash of fear in her eyes. "I did hurt you badly, didn't I?" I asked anxiously, while she nodded. "Just a little. But I don't mind, really I don't. You didn't do it on purpose." she replied whispering, while she scooted over a little.

"I'm so sorry, for hurting you." I whispered, while I kicked myself for this whole holding her tight thing. She got up, picked out a movie and popped it in. She came back over to the couch and plopped down next to me. "It's okay, El. Really, I think it's just your way for telling me you'll be there for me or to let me know you will protect me." she said softly, while she gave me a smile. We finished our beers and pizza in silence while we watched the movie. I hadn't realized she popped in Titanic until we were an hour into the movie. I carefully got up to get us both another drink, and sat down again. "Cassie, we really should check if I didn't cause any bruises on you." I stated, while she sighed. "It's fine, really. I don't feel a thing." she said sighing while looking at me and I gave her a smile. But somehow I didn't believe her statement, but decided it was for the best if I didn't push it I had pushed her enough today already. I was engrossed in the movie when I suddenly was hit with a pillow. "What was that for?" I asked surprised, while she kept hitting me with the pillow laughing. "I'm bored." she stated and got up, while she threw the pillow at me and quickly walked away. Laughing out loud she fled into the bedroom and slammed the door shut, when I got up and chased her laughing. When I walked into the bedroom, she was nowhere to be found, until I heard a muffled giggle coming from her closet. I walked up to the closet and opened the door, and picked her up. "You're not going to get away that easily, missy." I said laughing, while I dumped her on her bed and started tickling her, while she kept laughing. "Ouch!" she yelped suddenly and I stopped instantly. Carefully she pulled up her shirt, only to reveal a bruise that was going around her waist. She got up and looked in the mirror and gasped while turning around. "Oh my god, I knew I bruised easily, but this wasn't what I expected to happen." she exclaimed, while dropping her shirt and walking over to me.

"Maybe we should lay off for a while with sitting on your lap. At least, until this bruise is gone." she whispered, while I nodded and opened my arms to invite her in. I was shocked to say the least and I felt guilty, I did this to her. She walked into my arms and I just held her like that for a little while. "I'm so sorry for doing this to you." I whispered in her hair, and she huffed. "This is nothing in comparison to how I looked three years ago, remember." she stated, while looking at me. "And besides, you didn't do this on purpose. But for what it's worth, I was having fun anyway a few minutes ago." she said smiling, while she hugged me and held me close after that. We got back into the living room and intended to finishing the movie when my phone rang. I looked at it in surprise when I saw the captain's name flashing on my screen. "Stabler." I answered my phone and listened to what he had to say. "Okay, I'll give her the message. Thank you, captain. Goodnight." I ended the phone call and hung up. "What did Cragen want?" Cassie asked me worried. "He just called in to tell us he'll see us at work on Thursday. Which means we have another two days of free time. Although he wants to speak to us tomorrow morning." I said to her and she nodded. "Okay. It's slow at the precinct then." she replied and I nodded. "I guess so. But he said it we should see this as a short vacation. Since we had a lot of overtime. And I know you've build up a lot of it since three years ago, since you ignored his request to take time off after what happened and you never filed for vacation." I stated, and she huffed. "You know as well as I do I couldn't handle doing nothing and just hang around at home going crazy. Besides, you never filed for vacation either." she retorted and I chuckled. "I do know that. And I also know he tried to call you before he called me, but he said your phone went straight to voicemail." I said ignoring her statement about my vacation filing, while she looked at me. "Oh, damnit! Forgot to charge it." she exclaimed and went to fetch her phone and ran straight into her bedroom to put her phone in the charger.

* * *

 **CPOV**

I was wondering why Cragen gave us time off together, and started to worry about what the others would think about this. "El, I was just wondering. Do you know why Cragen gave the both of us time off?" I asked, while I plopped on the couch next to him. "Nope." he said popping the p. "The others must think there's something going on between us or something. Since we're both not working." I said with an anxious look on my face, until I started wondering if I really was bothered by what the others would think about the relationship El and I shared. "Don't worry about it. Let them think about us what they want to think, we know the truth." he said, while I nodded. "Do you have any idea why Cragen wants to see us tomorrow?" I asked, while I looked at him. "I think he just wants to check up on how we're doing. Me starting the divorce, you coping with everything you're dealing with." he replied, while I nodded and I started thinking about what happened earlier today. "El, do you think we should mention the moments you held me so tight? I don't know how I wake up tomorrow, but if I can't walk up straight he'll get suspicious." I said, while he looked at me worried. "You think it will hurt more tomorrow? If that's the case, I think we should go to the hospital tomorrow to have you checked." he replied anxiously. "I don't know. But it could just be my muscles that will be aching, not the bruise itself. But I think we need to explain to Cragen that no one actually hurt me on purpose if I can't walk up straight." I stated with a small smile, I just wanted to be sure Elliot didn't get blamed for hurting me, since he didn't want to hurt me anyway. "I think you're right. But just know, I'm sorry, I really am." he replied, and I could hear in his voice he felt guilty as hell about this. Slowly I got up, when I remembered I hadn't locked the door yet, to do that. While walking toward the front door I started thinking about the subject we had talked about before dinner, but was startled out of my musings by Elliot's voice. "Cassie, you're not mad at me are you?" I heard him say, and I guessed he was following me.

"Of course not, why do you think that?" I said, while I turned around with a small smile on my face. "I don't know, you just got up and walked away." he replied, while I chuckled. "I just remembered I forgot to lock the door. But I'm not mad at you, I don't have any reason to be mad." I said smiling at him, and together we walked back to the living room. He sat down on the couch and I decided to get out of my comfort zone and sit down at his lap, while he gave me a smile. "I know you feel guilty about my bruise, but you don't have to." I said softly, and I noticed his arms were just at his sides. "You know what…" I started, and I noticed the questioning look on his face. "Let's just forget about it, for tonight and enjoy the movie." I whispered, while I snuggled closer into his chest. "You know I can't. I did that to you, even if I was just enjoying having you close the moment it happened, I'm the one to blame for it." he replied, while he carefully put his arms around my waist. I flinched a little, but noticed he laid them loosely around my waist. "Just promise me, you won't do that again when we're sitting like this." I whispered, and I felt him nod, I smiled and turned my focus back to the movie. During the movie he kept apologizing to me in whispers, I let him be, until I had enough of it. Even though I knew he felt he needed to do this, for his own sake it started to annoy me, so I got up and sat down next to him on the couch. "El for god sake, just stop it. It's getting annoying." I said while I looked up at him only to see the tears in his eyes. I gently grabbed his chin and turned his head toward me. "It's okay, Elliot. I'm not mad, nor do I blame you for hurting me unintentionally. I know you feel like you need to do this, but it's not necessary. Even though I was scared for a moment, I forgave you instantly. I love you as a friend, El. I don't want to lose you over something like this." I said softly, while I looked him in the eye, to show him I meant it.

"I never felt so guilty in my life, especially since I just wanted to comfort you. I hurt you by just holding you. When I saw that bruise earlier tonight, it hurt like hell to see you like that. And I was thinking how it was possible that I did that. I love you too as a friend, Cassie. And you won't get rid of me, until you're tired of being my friend." he said, while he looked at me with a small smile. I sighed but smiled at him and laid my head on his shoulder. "Actually you did feel that guilty once before. Three years ago." I said grimly and he nodded. The movie ended and I sat up straight, while Elliot picked out another movie to watch and I took out my laptop again to search for a new apartment. "I remember that. But let's not talk about it for now." he said, while he sat down again and laid his arm at the back of my couch and I found an apartment close to the apartment I now lived in. "Look! It's just around the corner! It's not much bigger than I have now, but it looks great. I think I give them a call tomorrow." I said and looked at him, and he nodded with a smile. I put away my laptop and laid my head on his shoulder, while his arm fell softly around me. It wasn't the first time we watched a movie like this at my place, his wife knew we had a movie night once a week and didn't think anything about it. Of course we all knew there was nothing going on between Elliot and me, although Kathy didn't know we always ended up sitting like this. But in the end he brought me to bed, when I fell asleep and got home after he carefully locked my door with the spare key they had. But since I changed the locks I never gave them a spare key, I actually didn't thought about it and just forgot to do it eventually. But Elliot never mentioned it, but started to spend more time with me than usual. When I asked him about it, he just waved it off as being a good friend who had to make sure I was alright and had fun. At the end of the year I exploded, he was getting on my nerves since he almost never left my side after he figured out I slept at the precinct, we had a short fight about it, but made up before the others could figure out what was going on. I knew he meant nothing with the closeness, but when I observed his behavior later on I started to get the feeling something was wrong, of course he waved me off when I asked what was wrong and just said he had a little disagreement with Kathy. I knew my gut feeling about it was right when he told me what actually was going on the other night at the precinct.

That was when I started to think all those fights had to do with how close Elliot and I were, but when he told me yesterday that it wasn't the case and told me what really was going on, I felt relieved. "What are you thinking?" he suddenly asked, and I shrugged. "Nothing really." I waved him off, but he didn't buy it. "Okay, okay. I actually remembered I never gave you and Kathy a spare key, like you had before it happened. Somehow it slipped through my mind, I guess." I explained, with a smile. "And then I thought about the fight we had, after I exploded at you last year. Did you know that was the first and only fight we ever had?" I asked, while he nodded chuckling. "That was pretty funny actually. One moment we were fighting and the next we were laughing and joking again, like nothing ever happened." he said laughing, and I nodded. I got up and walked over to the desk and rummaged through the drawer. I found what I was looking for, and walked back to the couch. "Here you go." I said, handing him the key. I gave them a spare key for emergencies and they had to get in if necessary. "You know, just for emergencies." I said, while he smirked at me. "Why do I get the idea I won't be alone here that much?" I asked him, I knew that smirk. "Okay, okay. You can use it every time you come over until I move out." I gave in and looked at him only to find he was still smirking at me.

* * *

 **EPOV**

"I was just kidding. But I will only stay over if you feel like it. You just have to get used to be here alone again, I know it will take a while but whenever you feel like you need me to stay over just tell me. I don't want you going downhill again and see the Cassie that looks like hell, due to a lack of sleep." I said with a smile, while I looked at her. She was looking better, the purple bags beneath her eyes were almost gone, since she finally had a good night of sleep. "I know, I promise I will tell you when I feel like I need you to stay the night." she promised me, and I nodded. "Oh, another thing. Just promise me, to call me when you wake up after a nightmare. If you don't feel like calling me, just promise me to tell me when you see me in the morning." I pleaded, while she nodded and promised me to do that. We watched the movie until I noticed her eyes were closed and I decided to bring her to her room and put her on the bed putting the covers over her. I silently left the room and shut the door ajar. I stopped the movie and turned off the television, to get myself ready for the night. I plopped down at the couch, got comfortable and closed my eyes. I tossed and turned for a while, and sighed it seemed I couldn't sleep for now, so I just stared at the ceiling. I was just dozing off when I heard an agonizing scream coming from the bedroom. I jumped of the couch and ran into the bedroom, to find Cassidy sitting up, panting heavily while she cried.

I carefully sat down at the side of the bed and caressed her hair. "It's okay, sweetie. I'm here. Nothing will happen to you, you're safe." I said comforting her, while she sighed. I decided to get up and sit down next to her on the other side of the bed and take her in my arms. "I promise you, nothing will happen to you. I'm here with you and will keep you safe as long as you need me to." I whispered, while I felt her nodding against my chest. "Can you tell me what the dream was about?" I asked softly and she started to cry again but nodded. I calmed her down and she looked up. "Him, it was about him and about what he did to me three years ago. He didn't only beat and rape me, but he started stabbing me too. After that, he dragged me to the kitchen, where you were out cold on the floor and made me watch how he started stabbing you I started screaming, and woke up screaming." she told me sniffling, while I took her in my arms and comforted her. I pulled away from her so I could lay down, and she did the same, with her head on my chest. "El?" she started, and I looked down at her and hummed in reply. "I was thinking about what I told you earlier today or rather what I didn't tell you." she said quietly. "What about that? About what part are you talking anyway?" I asked her, while she looked up at me. "The part where you asked me how I felt about sitting on your lap." she said softly and I just hummed. "I didn't tell you everything that I felt beside weird but comfortable." she whispered, and she caught my attention. "Please, tell me if you want to." I pleaded with her, while I felt her nod against my chest. "Only if you promise me, not to walk away from me after I tell you everything." she said and I told her I promised to stay with her, whatever it was she was hiding from me I would be there for her. "First of all the main reason for me not dating is kind of you. I think I like you more than just as a friend, but I'm not sure it's real, maybe it's just you being here twenty four seven that makes my brain going crazy or something." she started and I was shocked. "Second, I didn't felt weird, but comfortable. I felt safer and more comfortable than I ever had." she added and I just felt honored. "I thought you were hiding something like that, and I can't tell you if it's real, like you said yourself. Since my brain is going crazy too, I think but I can tell you I'm honored to hear you feel safe when you're with me and that's something I want you to feel. I want to keep you safe, you're my best friend and partner after all." I said with a smile and she just nodded. "Sleep, Cassie. You'll need it." I whispered, and felt her nod while she drifted off. It didn't take long before I fell asleep too, and woke up again way to soon. Carefully I got up and walked to the kitchen to start breakfast, and heard Cassie starting to wake up. "I look like hell." I heard her sigh, before she came into the kitchen fully dressed. "Morning El. You're up early. Did you get any sleep at all last night?" she greeted me, while I nodded. When I turned around I could see what she meant when she said she looked like hell. "Good morning sunshine. I got as much sleep as you did after that horrific nightmare you had." I said, while I gave her a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon. "Eat." I said, while I turned around to make her a cup of coffee. When her coffee was done I gave it to her and picked up my own plate of food and my cup of coffee and sat down on the opposite of her, while I thought about what she said last night. Somehow it made me happy to finally know the truth but it also made me wonder if she really felt this way for three years now. I shook my head to get out of my thoughts before my breakfast got cold.

When I was done eating I got up and did the dishes before taking some clothes out of my suitcase and taking a shower. "Damn it! Cassie! Can you please throw in some towels for me?" I yelled, and soon enough I heard her rummaging through a closet and opening the bathroom door. "They're on the sink, El." she said and got out as fast as she could. When I was finished and dressed I walked into the bathroom to find she already made up the bed and could hear the sounds of the television and her walking around the house. "If you're up to it, we can go and see the captain, when you're ready." I said, observing her movements. "Sounds good. I just want to get this over with." she replied, while she turned off the television and turned around slowly. I saw her flinch when she started walking to the hallway to collect her coat and keys. "Are you okay?" I asked her, while she nodded. "Yeah, just my stomach that's a bit painful. I told you yesterday that it could be hurting more today." she said, and walked out slowly while I followed her out and locked the closed door. We drove to the precinct in a comfortable silence. I parked the car and got over to the passenger side and helped her out of the car. Together we walked into the precinct to find Olivia, John, Brian and Fin already there. _Okay, this is going to look so bad_ ran through my mind, while I greeted them. We walked straight to the captain's office and knocked. He invited us in and I closed the door. "Good morning captain." we both said, while I saw him looking at Cassidy anxiously. "Cassidy, how are you holding up?" he asked her, while she slowly stepped forward. "Good, I guess. Didn't sleep so well last night, because of a nightmare. But I'm good seen the circumstances." she replied, while she stepped back.

"You want to share the nightmare?" he asked her, while she shook her head. "I prefer not to, but if you want to know what it was about, Elliot can tell you if you don't mind if I leave when he tells." she replied softly while he nodded. She walked out of the room and I decided to sit down. "It was about three years ago, but worse than what actually happened. She dreamed he was stabbing her, before making her watch him stabbing me." I told him with a sigh. "It took me a while to calm her down, when I got in the room after she woke up screaming. As you know I left Kathy, and Cassie offered me her couch." I explained when I noticed the puzzled look on his face, when I had explained her nightmare. "I see, if the nightmares get worse, make sure she keeps up with the appointments with Dr. Huang. I noticed she's walking slower than normal, something happened to her?" he asked and my eyes widened. "Yes, but it was completely my fault. I just held her too tight when she needed some comfort. I was tightening my grip around her waist, when she only wanted to order some food the first time. She ensured me I didn't hurt her, but of course I felt guilty, I still do. The second time, she wanted to get something to drink but this time I did hurt her but she claimed it was just a little." I explained, and he looked worried. "Later that evening we were goofing around a little, since Cassie was bored, she started throwing pillows at me, and we ended up in her bedroom, and I started tickling until she cried out in pain, I stopped immediately. She got up, and pulled up her shirt only to reveal a bruise around her waist." I said with a sigh, and he got up. "Detective Sullivan, can you come in please?" he called her back in, and she came in a couple of minutes later. "Elliot told me, he accidently hurt you last night?" he asked, and she nodded. "I don't blame him. He was just holding me a little too tight when I felt down. It's not hurting that bad anyway. It's just my stomach that's aching at the moment. He would never hurt me on purpose, captain." she told him, and he nodded.

* * *

 **CPOV**

"Can I see the bruise?" the captain asked, and I nodded. Elliot got up and closed the blinds so I wouldn't be exposed to the others. I didn't want them to know about it, so when they asked me when I came out the captain's office I told them I had a stomach ache, which they seemed to accept. I carefully pulled up my shirt and turned around, to show the extent of my bruise. I heard a gasp and I dropped down my shirt. "Benson, out!" the captain yelled. "It could have been worse captain. This is nothing in comparison with three years ago." I ensured him, while he nodded. I felt some tears rolling down my cheeks and walked into Elliot's arms. He dried my tears, and smiled a little. "Did you need me for anything else captain? I think I need to be alone for a little while, until you and Elliot are done." I said, and the captain shook his head. "Elliot will join you in a minute. I just need to know how he's doing with the procedures for the divorce. You can head out if you want." he said, while I nodded. "You can wait in the car if you feel like it." Elliot said, while he handed me the car keys and I nodded once more. "Thank you." I said and left the office. I caught Olivia's glare and tried to get out of there as fast as I could. I was just in the elevator, when she caught up with me. "A stomach ache huh." she said, and I could feel the hostility, while she dragged me out the elevator. "Please, Olivia just let me go. Nothing happened." I pleaded, with tears in my eyes while she shot me another glare. "That bruise begs the differ, and you know that as well as I do!" she yelled at me. I heard quick footsteps, and I felt my cheeks turn bright red. "Just let go of me, Olivia! I don't want to talk about it, and if I wanted to, I wouldn't be talking to you!" I started screaming at her, while someone came closer. "Liv, let her go." a familiar voice said but she didn't listen. Her grip on my wrist grew tighter. "Someone has been hurting you, and you want him just to get away with it?" she yelled, while the pain was clearly visible on my face.

"Liv! You're hurting her, let her go!" Fin said, while Olivia kept holding on. "You're buying her lie about the stomach ache? If that's so, you're just as oblivious as Munch and Cassidy!" she yelled, glaring at me. "Olivia, get your hands off of her! If she doesn't want to talk about it, you have to respect that! Now let her go!" the captain's voice boomed through the hallway and Olivia let go instantly. She huffed and stalked off into the squad room. "You okay?" Fin asked me, while I nodded. _Another bruise to put on my list_ I thought angry. "You're sure, you're okay?" captain Cragen asked, and I nodded once more. "Just make sure to keep Benson away from me, when I get back to work on Thursday." I stated, while he nodded. "I'll make sure she stays out of your way, from now on. Take off as long as you need to." he promised me and I nodded once more before turning around and head back to the elevator. I pushed the button and sighed. I felt Elliot's hand on the small of my back, and I looked up at him with a small smile on my face. Together we stepped into the elevator to head for my place. "I guess I can put another bruise on my list, tonight." I said sighing, when my phone rang. "Sullivan." I answered. "Captain, what's going on?" I asked, and he started talking. He told me how Elliot had told him I bruise easily and that he figured I would show one on my wrist. He also told me I could take time off until the bruises were gone. "Okay, captain. Thank you. Bye." I ended the call and hung up. "I guess I'm not coming back to work until the bruises are gone." I sighed and I looked at Elliot. "You too huh. He ordered me to keep an eye on you until you're fine again, which means I'm not coming back here until you do." he said to me with a small smile and I groaned. "So he thinks I need a babysitter?" I stated bluntly, not that I minded spending more time with my best friend but I didn't need a babysitter. "You know I'm not your babysitter and I won't babysit you. He just wants to make sure you're fine." he said, while I huffed.

When we were out of the building I gave him the car keys and got in the car. The journey home was silent, but I didn't mind since it was a comfortable one. When we came home he helped me out of the car again, and we made our way into the building. I groaned when I hit the second stairway. Getting down the stairs wasn't the problem, but getting up was a completely different tale to tell. "Are you okay, Cassie?" Elliot asked me, while I shook my head. "It hurts too much, I can't even climb the stairs properly." I complained, and before I knew I was in his arms in bridal style. "El, put me down!" I exclaimed, while he shook his head laughing. "You can't walk up the stairs properly, so I carry you up the stairs, there's no point in arguing with me about that." he stated, while I put my arms around his neck and held on to the mail I took out of my mailbox. "Okay, put me down, we're at my floor. I can walk a flat service perfectly fine on my own." I said when we reached my floor, but he ignored my words and carried me to the door and put me down on my feet. I unlocked the door, opened it and walked in, throwing my keys into the bowl on the desk and sat down onto the couch and going through my mail. "El! I think you're papers came in!" I yelled, knowing he was in the bathroom. I heard him flush the toilet and come into the living room. I gave him the envelope and he opened it and started to read. I took care of the bills while he was reading the papers and signed them. "I'll bring these to Kathy. Want to join me? I guess she would be thrilled to see you again." he said with a sarcastic tone in his voice, while I nodded chuckling. We got out of my apartment and locked the door heading to the parking garage.

 **N/A: I hope you like the first chapter! Let me know what you think by using that beautiful review button, thanks.**


	3. Chapter Two: False Accusations

**Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Dick Wolf, except the plot and Cassie.**

 **Chapter Two: False Accusations**

 **EPOV**

When we got into the parking garage we got into the car and drove off. "I just wait out in the car. I don't want Kathy to think there something going on between us." she suddenly said, while she was looking at her hands. Soon enough we reached the building where Kathy worked and I looked at her. I noticed the bruise on her wrist already started to show, and I figured she only said what she said as a pretext. "You sure you want to wait here?" I asked her, while she looked at me. "You noticed too, huh?" she asked pointing at her wrist, and I nodded. "I just don't want Kathy to notice. I don't need an interrogation from her." she explained, while I nodded. "Wait a second, I think I have something to cover that up. Check the glove box, please." I said, while she opened it and rummaged through it. "What am I looking for, anyway?" she asked, while looked up. "Oh right, Um, let me have a look." I said, and started searching through it until I figured out what I was looking for wasn't there anymore. "Damn it. I think you need to cover it up with your hand." I said, while she nodded and did what I asked. I got out of the car and walked over to her side and helped her out. Together we walked into the building and got to the floor where Kathy worked. "Hi, Kathy. I have something you need to read, sign and send back to my lawyer." I said and held out the divorce papers. "Elliot, Cassidy, what a lovely surprise." she said happily, while I tried not to roll my eyes. "Hi Kathy." Cassie said, the hostility thick in her voice. I noticed she held her left hand on her right wrist and I knew she tried her best to cover it up. "How are you doing, Cassidy. You look awful did you get some sleep the last couple of nights?" Kathy asked, she hadn't noticed or just ignored the hostility Cassidy showed. "I'm fine, Kathy." she said, while she turned around to walk away.

Kathy narrowed her eyes at me. "What?" I said, looking at her. "You were supposed to keep an eye on her. She looks like hell, Elliot!" she said with venom rolling through her voice. "I'm right here, you know. And for your information, Elliot is keeping an eye on me. Actually, he's taking care of me for the last couple of days. Helping me to get used to being at home longer than one night at a time!" Cassidy replied, before I could answer. "And you know what, he's staying over at my place for the last two nights after he caught you cheating on him AGAIN!" she hissed venomously at Kathy while coming face to face with her. "Besides, he actually does try to keep me safe, and talk to me when I feel like shit. Something you never did, since it happened. You only offered me a place to stay after it happened, but you never even tried to comfort me or to talk to me about it!" she hissed once more before turning around and walk away. "I'll make sure the papers get to your lawyer. Signed and sealed." Kathy said softly, with tears in her eyes knowing Cassidy told the truth. "Thank you." I said and turned around to find Cassidy. When I got outside, I felt in my pockets for my car keys, only to realize I lost them. To be sure I didn't forget my keys in the car I walked to the car, only to find Cassidy sitting inside snapping her phone shut. I got in and saw how furious she looked. She gave me the keys and I put on the engine. I had never seen her this way and it was quite scary. "Take me home!" was the only thing she said the entire ride home. When we arrived, we got out of the car and I carried her up stairs only to put her down on her feet once we arrived at her floor. I quickly made my way to her door, opened it and got in. She slammed the door shut and locked it instantly, before she walked into the living room and sat down on the couch. When I made it into the living room I found her sleeping on the couch. I carefully sat down on it and looked at her. I felt bad for her, but I had to wake her up, otherwise she wouldn't sleep through the night. "Wake up, shorty." I said, while I stroked her cheek softly. "hmpf." Was her only reply, but she opened her eyes slowly and sat up.

"I'm sorry for what I said, at Kathy's office." she said softly, while I gave her a smile. "You just told her the truth and with how she was talking to me like you weren't there, I can't blame you for getting angry with her. But you got through to her she seemed to know you're right." I said, while I smiled at her. She scooted over and gave me a hug, which I returned before I carefully took her right hand. "Let me see your wrist." I said, and to say I was shocked was an understatement. "Did Olivia do this to you?!" I exclaimed, while she took a look at it herself and I saw her eyes widened. She quickly pulled her hand out of mine and hid the bruise with a sigh and tears rolling down her face. Before I knew it she hid her face in my shirt crying. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?" I asked while I pulled my fingers through her hair. "I hate that I bruise that easily." she cried, while I tried to comfort her, by whispering soothing words. "I know, but it's not your fault you bruise that easily. I've told you that before, remember? When you had that meltdown after you fell at the ice ring, when you were babysitting Kathleen?" I recalled, and I felt her nod. "Now, why don't we get out of the house for a while. Heading out to the park, catch a movie, go out to dinner?" I suggested while I took her chin so she would look at me. "I don't feel like going out for a movie. Have you noticed what I look like?" she exclaimed, and I understood what she meant. "You're afraid of what people will think when they notice your wrist and appearance. But we can cover up that bruise, and the bags under your eyes. But it's up to you." I said, while she looked at me like I was crazy. "Why didn't I think of that! I think I need your help finding a bracelet that's big enough to cover up that bruise. Oh, by the way I have an appointment tomorrow to check out the place. I need to be there at noon." she said and jumped up from the couch, while I nodded smiling and just followed her into the bedroom. She rummaged through her beauty case, which she obviously didn't use often, to find something to conceal the purple bags under her eyes. "Ha! Got it!" she exclaimed and got into the bathroom to apply the foundation to conceal the purple bags. When she was done she came back into the bedroom and took some other things out of her beauty case and got into the bathroom again.

While she was applying her make-up I opened her jewelry box that was on the dresser and started searching for a bracelet that was big enough to conceal the bruise, but didn't put too much pressure on it. "All done." she said, while she came back into the room and I looked up at her. I couldn't recall seeing her like this before, but I was stunned. She looked so different with make-up on, that I almost didn't recognize her. "You look beautiful, Cassie." I breathed, while I found myself staring at her. "If I was just walking down the street and you came by, I'm sure I wouldn't recognize you." I said, and she let out a giggle, one I never heard before. "You found a bracelet to conceal the bruise?" she asked, while I shook my head. "Hmm, let me have a look. I know I have a big bracelet. But maybe I misplaced it." she said, while she rummaged through the jewelry box but huffed in annoyance. "Damn it! Where did I put that darn bracelet." she grumbled, while she opened one drawer after another. "You know what, why don't we go out and look for a new one." I suggested and she nodded. "I think that's a good idea. Let me clean up this mess. The room looks like someone just burglarized it." she stated, but I stopped her. "Let me. You need to sit down for a second and think about that bruise on your waist. You can barely climb the stairs, let alone walk normally. You shouldn't be doing the cleaning right now." I said, and she nodded while she sat down on her bed. I cleaned her bedroom quickly, so we could go. "You ready to go?" I asked, when I was done cleaning up and she nodded. When I looked at her for a second time I noticed she had changed her clothes. I didn't notice her changing clothes. "When did you change your clothes?" I asked stunned by her new look. "When you were cleaning up, and too busy to notice I was changing." she said smiling at me, while my jaw dropped. "You did what? When I was here?! Are you out of your mind! What if I saw you changing?" I started panicking, while the only thing she did was laughing, and hard. "Relax, El. How many times I bumped into you in only a boxer short?" she said laughing, while I just stared at her in utter shock. "Let's go, El. And Um… you'll catch flies if you don't close your mouth." she said, while she put a finger under my chin and pushed it upwards to close my mouth. I quickly recovered myself and led her out of the room.

* * *

 **CPOV**

I was still chuckling about his almost panic attack when he led me out of the room. But I was wondering why he actually started panicking when I admitted I just changed when he was still in the room. "El, why were you panicking when I told you I changed while you were still in the room? It's not like you would jump me if you saw it, right?" I asked carefully when we were driving towards the mall to get me another big bracelet. I didn't get an answer, so I decided to be patient. We drove the rest of the way in silence, and before we knew we arrived at the mall parking lot. We got out of the car and I grabbed Elliot by his arm, to stop him. "El, you didn't answer my question, yet." I asked, and I looked at him only to find him looking away from me. "It's just…" he started with a sigh. "It's inappropriate to see your best friend in only her underwear." he said, without looking at me and started walking again. I raised my eyebrow, but followed him inside. When we got into the jewelry shop we browsed around, until I found a beautiful bracelet that was able to conceal the bruise, but when I saw the price tag I just sighed and turned around. I was walking out of the jewelry shop and looked over my shoulder only to discover Elliot hadn't followed me out. I just shrugged and decided to look at the jewelry that was stalled out at the window, until Elliot would join me. I was engrossed in my own thoughts when I suddenly felt something on my right wrist and was pulled back to the present time. "See it as an apology. For what I did to you last night." he said, with a small smile on his face. "El, you didn't have to. I would have found something that was less expensive." I said softly, still admiring the beautiful bracelet. "I saw you looking at it, and I just knew you were disappointed because it was so expensive. By the look on your face I just knew you wanted to have it, so I decided to buy it as a gift to apologize for the last time." he explained, and then it hit me why he panicked after I admitted I changed when he was there.

"It kills you from the inside out, doesn't it. Ever since you saw that bruise last night. That's why you panicked after I admitted that." I whispered, while he just nodded. "El, how many times I have to tell you. I'm not mad at you, nor do I blame you for hurting me. It was just an accident, you didn't mean to and you know as well as I do that I know you didn't want or meant to hurt me." I whispered once more, while I gave him a hug and a kiss on his cheek. I looked once more at my new bracelet that concealed the bruise perfectly. "Thank you for this beautiful gift, El. I owe you." I whispered softly in his ear before letting him go. He smiled brightly at me, while he put his hand on the small of my back and led me back to the car. We got in the car and decided to enjoy the nice weather at the park that was close to my apartment, we drove into the parking garage at my building, and walked out of it heading to the park. We took a walk through the park until we found a nice spot to sit down and relax for a while. "It's beautiful out here, I never went here before to be honest. Of course I went to the park a lot of times, but just not at this spot." I admitted, while I just stared out over the pond. "You know I found this place shortly after what happened to you? I wasn't allowed to join the investigation, since I was a victim too. So when visitation hours were over at the hospital I took a walk through the park and stumbled onto this place. I come here ever since, when we closed a tough case even Kathy doesn't know about it. Just wanted to keep it to myself, to share it later with you, when you were ready to go outside again without being scared all the time." he admitted, while I nodded. "I never had a special or secret place anywhere. But I have to admit, it's nice to have one even though it's a shared one." I said chuckling, while I watched him for a while, and I noticed he was completely relaxed. "This is my first too. I had one with Kathy, but it wasn't that special though, it was just some shady bar where we were going during college." he said chuckling, while I joined him. "Is there a reason you only want to share this spot with me?" I asked curious, not that I was thinking something of it but I was just a curious person. "You're a curious one, aren't you?" he answered while I laughed softly. "I just wanted to have a place, where we could go when you're not feeling well. To get you out of the house a little bit more, and to seek refuge after a tough case or just to hide from our colleagues, who can be annoying, like this morning for example." he told me, while I raised an eyebrow at him. "I don't think I'm able to find this on my own." I said smiling. "Who said I would let you come here on your own? I found this spot, so it's basically mine." he teased, while I laughed. "Okay, I get it. I'm not allowed to come here without your permission." I teased him back.

I slowly started to regret my choice of clothing, when the temperature dropped. "You cold?" he asked, when I noticed I had started to shiver. "Yeah, kind of. I should have known these clothes were too thin for this weather." I said, while I gave him a small smile. "How about grabbing a bite to eat at the diner on the corner of the street and head home after?" he suggested with a smile. "Sounds great. Just so you know, I liked hanging out with you today, I really enjoyed being out of my apartment for once without it being work related." I told him smiling, while we walked to the diner. "Me too. It's good to get out of the house every once in a while, without being out of the house for work related things. And it's a lot more enjoyable if you can share those days with a friend." he said with a smile, while we entered the diner and took our seats. We both ordered a burger and a coke, while we talked small talk. Soon our food was served and ate in silence, just enjoying each others company. When we were done we both paid for our food and drinks and headed home. "We have another couple of days off, any idea what to do with those?" I asked him, while we slowly walked back to my apartment. Halfway our walk it started to snow lightly and I shivered once more. "I don't know, but we'll figure it out. Let's hurry to get you inside, you're freezing." he replied, while we picked up our pace and got into my apartment. "You should take a shower to warm up a little." he said while I nodded and got into my bedroom.

* * *

 **EPOV**

I waited until I heard the shower running and got into the bedroom to get some blankets for when she was finished with her shower. I turned on the television and flipped to the channel that hosted one of my favorite programs, while I waited for Cassidy to come back into the room. A while ago I noticed that the shower had stopped running, but I hadn't heard her come out of the bathroom. I decided to wait for another while, before I started to worry and just watched the show which was still on for another thirty minutes. When the show was over I got up to check up on her, only to find the bathroom door ajar. I gave it a knock but got no answer and walked in carefully to find her sitting on the floor. Panic washed over me when I saw her eyes were closed, so the first thing I did was check for a pulse, which was a bad decision when she opened her eyes screaming at the top of her lungs. "Sshh, sshh, sweetie, it's okay, it's just me Elliot." I said softly and kept repeating that, until she calmed down. "What happened?" I asked when she finally calmed down. "I don't know. I was wrapping myself in the towel and when I came to I was on the ground." she replied, while looking around. "Let's get you dressed. I feel more relieved if you let me take you to the hospital, just a check up so we know there's nothing serious going on, okay?" I stated, and she nodded while I helped her up. "I'll just be around the corner if you need any help." I said and walked into her living room, while she started to dress. Slowly she came out of the bedroom and looked up at me. "Ready to go." she said, while I looked at her only to find out she looked exhausted. "Let's go." I said, while we started to walk out of the room and out of the house after I unlocked the door. I kept an eye on her while we walked out of the building into the parking garage and got in the car. While we were driving to the hospital I took a couple of glances just to be sure she was still conscious. After a short drive we arrived at the hospital and got out of the car, and got inside. I filled in the papers, and explained the doctor who got to check up on her what happened, and he started the check up.

"Sir, how did miss Sullivan get those bruises?" the doctor asked me. "He didn't meant to hurt me, doctor. He just held me too tight when I was on his lap after I needed some comfort and when I wanted to get up to sit down next to him his grip tightened which caused the bruise. The bruise on my wrist happened when a colleague caught up with me and held me to tight. I just bruise extremely fast. I get bruises all the time while being on the job." she piped up, before I could say anything. "Okay, miss can you tell me what happened before you got here?" he asked her, while she briefly looked at me. "I was in the shower, and when I got out I wrapped myself in a towel then everything went black, I think. I don't know what happened exactly, only that I gained consciousness or woke up, when Elliot touched me in my neck to check if I had a pulse." she told him, while I nodded. I gave her a worried look and I walked over to her head. She reached out to me with her hand, which I took. "I'll need to take some blood samples, to rule out certain serious deceases." the doctor said, while he got the supplies he needed. "You have to take blood?!" she started panicking, while she squeezed my hand. "Relax, sweetie. It's just to make sure you're not sick. You'll be okay." I tried to comfort her, while stroking her hair. "I don't like needles." she said so softly I almost missed it. I moved to her side and whispered softly to her and told her to just squeeze my hand and look at me, while the doctor did his job. He took a couple of tubes of her blood, and gave me a small nod. "He's ready. You can let go of my hand now or at least loosen your grip." I said softly, while she gave me a little smile. "I'll take this to the lab immediately and make sure they work as quick as possible. But in the mean time I want her to stay for a couple of hours, just for observation." the doctor said and I nodded while I picked up a chair and sat down next to her bed. I talked softly to her and tried to keep her calm until the results came in.

Cassidy fell asleep after a while, and I just stayed at her side waiting for the doctor to come in with the results. I must have dozed off because I jumped when someone touched my shoulder. "Her blood results came out clean. It's nothing serious. Do you know if she had a good night's rest over the last couple of days?" he asked me, while I looked at her and then back to him. "Actually I do know. I crashed at her couch for the last couple of days due to private issues. The first nights she slept through the night, but last night she woke up screaming after having a nightmare. As far as I know that's the only night she didn't get much sleep. A couple of days back, she slept a couple of nights at the precinct but I don't know if she had good nights of sleep over there." I explained to him, while he nodded. "Did she suffer any stress lately, due to a traumatic event?" he asked, and I nodded. "She did, the last six weeks or so. I take it you read her file and read about the attack she suffered three years ago? Her attacker is coming out of jail in a couple of months. She's worrying about it, and pretty scared too." I explained, while I started to worry more about her. "She's just extremely exhausted. She'll be discharged in a couple of hours, I would send you home, but I think it's for her own good if you just stayed with her, she seems to feel safe when you're around." he said, and I nodded. "Thank you doctor." I said with a smile and sat down again. After a while she started tossing and turning and shaking her head heavily before she shot up with a scream. "I'm here, you're fine. It was just a nightmare, sweetie. Do you know where we are?" I asked,while she looked at me and nodded. "At the hospital, you took me here, after I blacked out. Just to check if there was anything wrong." she replied, while I nodded. "The doctor came in a while ago. He said you're just extremely exhausted, due to all the stress you've been through, you'll be discharged in a few hours." I said, and she nodded, and I noticed the tears rolling down her cheeks. "You had the same nightmare as last night, didn't you?" I asked and she nodded crying. I walked around the bed and put down the sidebar from the bed and climbed in next to her. I took her in my arms to calm her down and noticed she had fallen asleep, I kissed her hair and held her close.

I had fallen asleep only to be woken up by a shocked statement. "Elliot! What's going on?" a male voice said, while I tried to recognize it and to find the person who belonged to it, only to find captain Cragen at the foot of the bed. "Captain." I said, while I carefully got of the bed in slight embarrassment. "What happened, they called me as soon as she got in. Did you know she wrote me down as her next of kin?" he asked, and I nodded. "It was Kathy and me at first, but since everything Kathy and I are going through she decided it was for the best to put down someone else, when we got in earlier. After we got home, from a day out she went to shower and shortly after she wrapped herself in a towel she just blacked out. I decided to check up on her, when she didn't get out of the shower after an hour. I found her unconscious at the bathroom floor, instinctively I checked for a pulse and that was when she gained consciousness again, screaming." I explained and he nodded. "What's the verdict?" he asked, and I gave a small smile. "It's nothing serious, she's just extremely exhausted due to a lack of sleep and the stress she's going through. But she can go home in an hour or so." I said, and he nodded. "Just one more question, what were you doing sleeping in the same bed?" he asked me, and I sighed. "She woke up after a nightmare, so I got in next to her to calm her down and soon after she fell asleep. By the time I normally would be sure she was sleeping I had fallen asleep too. I'm just trying to get her through all of this as safe as possible, I promised her I would be there for her, even though I'm going through a tough time myself." I explained and he nodded and I knew he understood there was nothing between the two of us. "To explain why I'm here this late. We just closed a tough case, so I couldn't leave immediately, without having the others think there was something wrong with one of our squad. And just so you know… I never thought there was more going on between you and Cassidy than just partnership and a close friendship. I'm glad she has a friend like you, Elliot. She's like a daughter to me just like you are as a son to me." he said with a smile and I nodded.

"Why did she change her next of kin from Kathy to me?" he asked, and I shrugged. "She didn't tell me why. But I think I know why she did it. After we got back from the precinct I got the divorce papers in, I signed them and had to bring them to Kathy. Since Cassidy still doesn't like to be alone in her apartment, even during daytime she came with me when I headed to Kathy's work to drop of the papers. As usual, Kathy acted like nothing happened between us, but Cassidy was hostile to her and well you saw her this morning and she looked like hell. When Cassidy had turned away, Kathy started talking about her as if she wasn't there and that set her off. Cassidy told her off about her cheating on me and confronted her about the fact that Kathy never tried to talk with her about what happened to her three years ago. She kind of defended me, since Kathy was blaming me for how Cassidy looked." I explained to him, while he just listened. "It's true, captain." Cassidy said softly. "I see why you changed your next of kin. But can you tell me, why you chose me as your next of kin?" the captain asked her, and she nodded. "Since I got out of my childhood home, to live by myself I never heard from my parents again. After what happened to me, the hospital called them, and they just told the nurse to leave them alone and never call them again if I was brought in again and that it was my own fault. So I put down Kathy and Elliot as my next of kin after that. And well after what happened earlier today, I didn't want Kathy as my next of kin, and since Elliot was with me when I got here I thought it was weird to put him down as my next of kin. You're like a father to me, a father I never had at home even though my father was there he didn't treat me as his own. That's why I chose to put you down as my next of kin." she explained and I could see captain Cragen was touched by what she told him. We both sat down on one side of the bed and just talked to her. "I'll go and get us some coffee captain." I said, and got up and walked out of the room to get us coffee.

* * *

 **CPOV**

"You know what I confessed to Elliot, before you woke up?" captain Cragen asked, while I shook my head. "I told him you're as much as a daughter to me, as he is a son." he said with a smile on his face. "You know about our childhood. I'm glad you know about that." I said with a smile, while Elliot was still out to get coffee. "You told me about yours, yes. I was touched by your confession, Cassidy." the captain said, while I nodded and started wondering how long it took to get some coffee, until I heard loud voices coming closer. "What the hell are you doing to her, Elliot!" a familiar female voice shouted and I flinched as I recognized Kathy's voice. "God no. Not her." I grumbled. "I don't know who informed you of Cassidy's stay here, but I do know she doesn't want to see you, just get out of here." I heard Elliot yell. "I saw the bruise on her waist Elliot, and she just lied about it in my face." Olivia's voice sounded through the hallway and I rolled my eyes. "Did you tell anyone at the precinct I was here? Or did you let them know you came in here to visit me?" I asked the captain, while he shook his head. "How could Olivia possible know I'm here?" I wondered out loud, while I saw how the captain's eyes widened. "I know it was your doing Elliot! You caused that bruise on her waist!" Olivia shouted, and I flinched. "I now for a fact, you never left her apartment, since you got there Sunday morning. It wasn't a coincidence the two of you came in together this morning to see Cragen." she rambled on and the door flew open. "You did what!" Kathy came in screaming at him, while I watched them. Elliot stayed quiet and didn't reply and I knew why. Both of them kept screaming and yelling at him, until I had enough. "ENOUGH! SHUT UP, BOTH OF YOU!" I screeched, and they finally fell silent. "I don't appreciate that you're talking about me if I'm not here, let alone your attacks at Elliot. I want you out. Both of you!" I said angry, while Kathy huffed and stalked out of the room. "You're protecting him, after he hurt you? How could you! You deal with victims like you every single day, and you're protecting the man who hurt you?" Olivia ranted at me, while I glared at her. "You don't know anything about me! If Elliot really had done this to me, I didn't let him near me. And for your information, three years ago that anonymous case you worked on? That was me! I personally requested to list me as anonymous, and requested for anonymity, that's why there weren't any pictures of the raped and beat up victims face. And believe me, it was worse than this. There is a reason that Elliot's never leaving my side, there's a reason for me only confiding in captain Cragen, Fin, Brian and Elliot. I knew Elliot before I started at SVU, we are friends for a long time, why do you think Cragen didn't give me another partner? Do you want to know why Elliot wasn't working after I was attacked? Since he was a victim too! He got smacked in the head by the person who did that to me. He was just dropping me off after work, and it was the night we had movie night, like we still have once a week. But my ex-boyfriend got into my house, knocked out Elliot before he attacked me. And you know why? Because I broke up with him!" I ranted, while crying only to feel Elliot's hand on my shoulder. "Olivia, leave now! I'll see you tomorrow in my office!" the captain said, Olivia huffed and stormed out of the room.

By the time she was out of the room I was still panting heavily. "How did Olivia and Kathy know Cassie is here?" Elliot asked, while I just shrugged, the only thing I wanted now, was going home, I didn't feel comfortable here anymore. "Olivia must have followed me here and inside and hear me asking for your room. And I guess, Olivia called Kathy, since beside you, Cassidy and me no one knows about your situation with Kathy." the captain answered while I gasped. "Okay, I'm done. I want to go home, now!" I stated, while Elliot had a troubled look at his face. "I'm afraid I can't do that, miss Sullivan. After what happened a couple of minutes ago, I rather keep you here until morning." the doctor said, who just came in and had apparently heard what just happened. "Sir, are you okay?" he asked Elliot, while he nodded. "A little shaky, but nothing I can't handle." he answered with a smile. "I'll let you rest. I'll stop by later tomorrow at your place." the captain said and got up while I nodded. "Thank you for coming, captain." I said with a small smile, and he walked out of the room. "I don't feel comfortable anymore, El." I whispered. "Not now Olivia and Kathy both know I'm here." I kept going on whispering, while he nodded. "How about I call Fin, and ask him to come over to keep an eye at your door." he suggested, and I nodded. Elliot called Fin and he agreed to come over. "I don't want to bad mouth anybody, but what was Olivia thinking? That I would press charges on you for hurting me unintentionally? She's crazy!" I stated, while I shook my head. "If she's bothering you again, just file a complaint with Cragen. You actually should have filed a complaint with him this morning, after how she treated you at the precinct." Elliot said, while I just shrugged. "I know Cragen saw the bruise on your wrist and I know he knows Olivia caused that one. I bet that's one of the things he wants to talk to her about tomorrow morning." he said, and I heard a knock on the door. "Can I come in? It's Fin." Fin said. "Sure come in." I replied, with a small smile. "You don't have to stand outside the door." I said, while he nodded. He sat down on the chair that Cragen had sat on earlier and looked at my wrist. "Olivia caused that one this morning?" he asked, while he pointed at my bruise and I nodded. "She followed Cragen up here, and called Elliot's soon to be ex. They both came in screaming at Elliot, when he was going for some coffee. When Kathy left, Olivia stayed, and tried to accuse Elliot for abusing me." I started, and his eyes widened. "Why would she do that?" he asked. "Remember this morning? When I said I had a stomach ache? When I showed the bruise on my waist to Cragen she came barging in and saw it. She obviously heard what I said to Cragen about what had happened." I told, while he nodded. "So when Kathy was out of the room, she started ranting about it to me, and told me bluntly I was protecting the man who had purposely hurt me. I got angry again so I blurted out what happened to me three years ago and after that the captain ordered her to leave and to come to his office first thing in the morning. But know she knows I'm here I'm scared she will come back, now the captain's gone." I explained and he nodded once more.

* * *

 **EPOV**

"She came storming into the squad room a couple of minutes before Elliot called me. She didn't seem to notice me, so I got out without saying anything." Fin told us and I sighed. I got the feeling she was going to dig up the files from Cassidy's case and I didn't want her to go through that again. "I bet she's digging up those case files right now. Was there beside you anyone else still at the precinct? Munch or Cassidy?" I asked, and Fin shook his head, soon after my phone rang. "Captain, what's going on?" I asked and Cragen told me what was wrong. "Are you sure?" I asked, while the captain confirmed it. "Damn it! I won't let her go through all of that again. We need to stop her right now." I almost yelled into my phone, while Cassie and Fin had a puzzled look on their faces. "So she called in Munch and Cassidy? What is she up to? Munch doesn't even know that the anonymous file is about Cassie. Only Cassie, Fin, you, Cassidy and I know. And Olivia now obviously since she angered Cassidy so much she just blurted it out." I answered once more, while the captain got on with his story. "Cassidy and Olivia are way too close for my liking the past couple of months. Before they started dating in public I knew for sure I could trust him, but now I don't know. Yeah, Fin's with us right now. Yeah I'll give him." I answered and handed the phone to Fin. After a short talk he handed the phone back to me. "Yeah, I'll go and try to get her out of here so we can come in. Okay, thanks for the heads up." I said and hung up the phone. "I need to find the doctor, we need to get you home. Cragen asked Fin and me to come in." I said and walked out of the room only to walk into the doctor a couple of minutes later. "Doctor, there is an emergency at the precinct and our captain needs all of us in, including Cassidy." I said, while the man nodded understanding. "I do a last check up and if she looks fine, she can go." he said with a sigh, while we walked back to her room together and he did the last check up and cleared her. I helped her getting dressed and we got out of the hospital.

We drove in silence with Fin following in his own car. We made our way through the traffic quickly and were at her building in record time. "I'm not going home, I'm coming with you!" she stated and I sighed. "I rather have you at home, just in case." I said, but I knew I wasn't going to get it my way with this. "I'm coming with you!" she said and I sighed once more before starting the car again and drove the rest of the way to the precinct in silence. Much to our surprise Munch and Cassidy were outside. "She called you in too?" Cassidy asked, while we shook our heads. "The captain did. Olivia is up to something, and it's not going to be pretty. She's digging around for that anonymous case file from three years ago." I explained and saw how Cassidy's eyes widened. "The hell she isn't! We can't put that girl through all of that again!" he exclaimed, and I knew he didn't know a damn thing about what Olivia was planning to do. "We need to bring Munch up to speed about this." Fin whispered, and I nodded. "There's something you need to know about that file, John. And it's for the best you hear that from us, rather than your partner." I said, while I poked Cassie softly in her ribs. "That case file is about me. When I made the 911 call I especially requested for Fin and Brian and I put in the request to keep it as anonymous as possible, that's why there aren't any photo's of the victims face in that file. There's a full copy of it at Cragen's office. It's not that I didn't trust you, John. But I didn't and still don't trust Olivia. So I couldn't take the risk, she figured it out." Cassie explained, and Munch's jaw dropped. "You're telling me, we investigated your attack three years ago?! I knew there was something familiar about it, when I read the statements from the victims involved. The male victims testimony sounded way too much like Elliot." Munch said with a smirk. "But how did Olivia find out about it?" he asked, while I sighed. "Olivia followed the captain to the hospital earlier tonight, and found out he was visiting Cassidy. She called Kathy and together they came barging in accusing me of things. Eventually we got into the room and Cassie managed to get Kathy out, but Olivia stayed behind and enraged Cassie so much, she just blurted out. That's why the captain called us in." I explained while they nodded. "The captain is talking to her now, but I think we can go in." Munch said and together we walked into the precinct to our squad room. When we reached the floor of our squad room and got out of the elevator I instantly felt the tension. I felt Cassie flinch when the yelling became louder.

"It's okay, you're safe. We won't let happen anything to you." I comforted her, and she seemed to relax a little. When we reached the door, Cassie stopped walking, refusing to go in. "I know you have a copy, captain! And I want to see it right now!" Olivia yelled, while I shook my head and barged into the squad room. "Never going to happen, Benson! Just drop it!" I yelled, while I walked toward her until we were head to head. "You're making it your life goal to harass one of our own, don't you?" I dared her, while I heard Fin, Cassidy, Munch and Cassie walk in. How they convinced her to come in to the squad room with them I didn't know, but I was glad they did. "I know what you did, Stabler. And I'm not going to rest until she's going to tell the truth! It was you who attacked her three years ago, I'm sure of that." she accused me once more of something I didn't do. "You don't know anything about me or Cassie, Benson!" I replied, shaking with anger. "Stop it! Just stop it, Benson!" Cassie yelled. "I don't care what you think, but I want you to stop accusing Elliot of things he never did!" she screeched, while she was head to head with Olivia just like me. "What is that between the two of you. You're glued to each others hips all the time. He never leaves you alone, he even stays the night!" Olivia started, and I heard Cassie panting heavily. Now you're going to get it, Benson I thought. "What is or what isn't going on between Elliot and me, is none of you business. Elliot is my friend, who's going through a tough time. I offered him a place to stay he accepted that offer, the reason why he's staying at my place is also none of your business." she yelled and raised her hand, ready to slap Olivia. I quickly shot up my hand to put hers down. "Stop digging, Benson!" I yelled and stepped back.

* * *

 **BPOV**

My jaw dropped when Olivia accused Elliot for the attack on Cassidy three years ago. But before I could say anything, Cassidy started to defend her partner and long time friend. After Elliot had stepped back, I took a step forward. "I don't know what you're up to, but you need to stop it. I know for a fact it wasn't Elliot, since I was one of the SVU detectives called to the scene on a special request from Cassidy. When we arrived, Elliot was still unconscious, he gained consciousness when the paramedics arrived. This was the reason Cassidy wanted the anonymity. And that's why there are two files of this case. Since the original file with all of the pictures was necessary to send higher up. They agreed to the anonymous file that would be kept in our own solved cases files." I explained, but I should have known she wouldn't accept it. "You're protecting him too? Fine do what you want, Brian! But I'm telling you, it's false! We've put away the wrong person!" she exploded, and I heard Cassidy growl. "Besides, can't Elliot defend himself? I only hear her blabbing crap and you defending him." she ranted on and on and I just shook my head. "You think I can't defend myself? I can, but I don't think it's necessary to defend myself from your bull shit, Benson! And for your information, Cassie isn't just defending me, but herself too." Elliot exploded, and my eyes fell on a trembling Cassie.

* * *

 **CPOV**

"I can see why you filed for divorce! Oh yeah, Kathy told me all about it. She even told me you left her claiming you caught her cheating on you. So tell me, Stabler. What were you and Sullivan doing at your house, when you left the day after with your suitcase? I bet you had sex with her." I was shocked, that was a low blow even for her and I knew for sure Kathy wouldn't lie about it. "That's low, Benson. Even for you! I know you seem to have some vendetta against me, but leave Kathy and Elliot out of this. And don't even think about digging into my background, since that's none of your business!" I yelled at her, while she just glared at me, and I thought about something. "You see this bruise?" I started, while pointing at my wrist. "You caused that this morning, when you grabbed my wrist while you attacked me about lying about my stomach ache, before you started accusing Elliot!" I yelled, and held up my right hand and pushed it in front her eyes. "Stop digging, and I won't put in a complaint about what happened this morning. Go on with the digging, and you will have a complaint or two on your ass, Benson." I said dangerously calm and stepped back, still trembling with anger. "So you think that empty threat will stop me from figuring out the truth? Think twice, scaredy-cat." she dared me, and I just smirked at her with a dangerous twinkle in my eyes. "Captain, I want to file two complaints about detective Benson. One for assaulting me, and one for harassment." I said with a sickly sweet voice to the captain, while I glared at Olivia only to see that her jaw had dropped to the floor. "Empty threat huh. I don't make empty threats, lady." I said, before I turned around and walked away, but then everything changed quickly and was a blur, before I hit the ground because someone pushed me out of the way but got knocked out by a desk.

"You okay?" someone asked, while I nodded and tried to open my eyes since I just gained consciousness again. Confused I took a look around the squad room only to find Olivia in handcuffs and Cassidy and Elliot knocked out on the floor. "Get Cassidy out of here, now!" the captain ordered, while someone picked me up to take me out of the squad room. "No, El! He is hurt, I need to get back in." I panicked, while one of the men held me tight in his arms. "Calm down, Cassie. He's going to be fine. It's for your own safety, Olivia was about to lunge at you again." a familiar voice told me, and I looked up to see Fin's face. "I can defend myself perfectly well!" I exclaimed while they just shook their heads and restrained me from running back in. "What the hell happened? One moment I was just walking away and the next I was thrown onto the floor and out cold?" I asked in confusion. "Benson was about to attack you from behind, and Elliot pushed you out of the way and you hit your head on a desk which knocked you out, Elliot took the blow to the head and was out cold instantly. Cassidy managed to cuff her before she hit him and knocked him out too." Fin told me, while I nodded. "You can come in now. I took Olivia to the tombs." the captain called us back in and even though the bruise on my waist hurt, I ran toward Elliot and got down on my knees next to him. "Welcome back, Brian." Fin said, and I felt a hand on my shoulder. "He'll be fine, Cassie." Brian said, while I nodded. I stayed on the floor until Elliot gained consciousness again. "What the hell?!" was the first thing he said and I smiled through my tears before I flung my arms around his neck to hug him. "Munch, come with me. I want to talk to Olivia, and since she's your partner I want you there." the captain ordered. Elliot struggled to get up, so I helped him to sit up. "Olivia knocked you out, while you pushed Cassie out of the way to protect her from the blow, which made her hit her head too only to be out cold for a moment." Fin told him, and he nodded. "You okay?" Elliot asked immediately. "I'm fine, just worried about you." I replied with a small smile. "Cragen and Munch are talking to Liv. I'm wondering why she's acting like that. It's not like her." Fin said, and I nodded. "She can't stand to see Elliot so close with Cassidy. Olivia and John aren't that close to one another. At least, that's what she told me a while ago, but I didn't think much of it." Brian said, and I nodded. "But she started acting like this, this morning. I just don't get it. I never did anything wrong to her. Besides, I knew Elliot before I got here, we were friends already." I said, shaking my head.

"Brian, Fin. Go home." the captain ordered and they left. "Are you okay?" he asked Elliot and me, and we nodded. "Munch is taking Olivia home. She explained to us what's going on and wanted me to tell you." he added, and I nodded. "Okay, what's going on?" I asked, while I watched Olivia being escorted out of the room by Munch. "Before you got here, she requested to change partners. I declined that request, not knowing there was coming a new detective to SVU until three weeks later. When I just got the news, Elliot came in to my office and requested to be partners with the new detective, telling me he knew the new detective, I accepted that request, and you came around. When you got partnered up with Elliot, Olivia got mad and became distant and hostile to John. Although she was mad at me at first, she changed her direction of anger toward you, the last couple of weeks." he explained and I nodded, remembering telling Kathy and Elliot about my transfer to SVU. "Why did you decline Olivia's request, to be partnered with Elliot?" I asked with a curious look on my face. "She didn't give up a reason to have a change of partner. So I called her in and asked her why, and she told me she just wanted to work with Elliot. I told her that wasn't a reason to get another partner, so I asked her again and she said she liked Elliot more than John. When I looked at her face I could see in her eyes she was hiding something from me, but eventually she admitted she had feelings for him, that was reason enough for me to decline the request." he told us, and then it hit me. "She still has feelings for him, hasn't she?" I asked, while the captain nodded. "But if she still has feelings for me, why is she dating Brian?" Elliot wondered out loud, and I nodded. "She admitted to be happy with Brian, and that she started to realize she needed to get over Elliot. She's still in that process, but she got jealous when she observed the close relationship you and Elliot share, and when she found out through Kathy that Elliot filed for divorce she started blaming you. Although Kathy told her what was going on, and that it had nothing to do with you. But she will get over it she's on leave for now." he told us and I nodded. "Let's go home." Elliot said, and I smirked. "Don't even think about driving. I'll drive, I promise I won't hurt the car." I said jokingly and we walked out of the building laughing, while he gave me the keys of the car.

* * *

 **EPOV**

I was glad we finally could go home. My head was throbbing since I gained consciousness again. "You have some painkillers at home, right? Aspirin or Ibuprofen or something like that?" I asked Cassie, and she nodded while she drove us home. She made the last turn and drove into the parking garage and parked the car at the usual spot. We got out of the car, and walked into the building. We started climbing the stairs and finally reached her floor and walked to her door. She unlocked and opened it, before letting me in to come in herself and locking the door. "Let me get you some painkillers. Your head must be hurting like hell. Mine hurts like hell anyways." she said with a small smile and walked through the bedroom into the bathroom, only to reappear a moment later with two aspirins. I walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water for both of us. "How are you holding up?" I asked when I noticed she had followed me into the kitchen. "Fine I guess. You, after everything what happened and we found out tonight?" she returned the question, while I smiled. "I can handle it." I replied, only to find her in front of me with tears in her eyes. I pulled her into my arms and kissed her hair. "I'm fine, don't worry about me." I whispered, and held her close. "That blow that knocked you out, was meant for me. You didn't have to push me out of the way, only to knock me out too. When they took me out of the room and I saw you laying there… I was just so worried and scared. I thought for a minute I lost you." she admitted sniffling, while she held me tight. "I told you, you wouldn't get rid of me until you're tired of me being your friend." I said laughing and leaned onto the countertop. "It's late, let's get some sleep." I suggested and I felt her nod against my chest. I led her out of the kitchen into the living room and started getting off my clothes, to slump down on the couch. When I looked up, I saw her looking at me and I raised an eyebrow. "Actually... I'm not that tired." she admitted and I started laughing. "Yeah right. I saw you staring at me. Just admit it, you like what you see." I joked, and saw her cheeks glowing bright red instantly. "I'm not tired, really. But I have to admit that I'm getting used to seeing you like that." she said smiling, while she turned around and walked into her bedroom. Just for a little bit of fun of my own, I decided to sneak up on her for the last time, but I instantly regretted my action when I was confronted with the bruise on her waist again, that was slowly fading into yellow by now.

When she was in a tank top I decided to go on with my plan to sneak up on her and put my arms around her waist. She squealed when my arms touched her skin. "El, you really need to stop sneaking up on me. What if you scare me so much that I elbow you in the stomach?" she asked, and I couldn't more than agree with her. I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and gave her the space to get into her sweatpants before slipping my arms around her waist again. "El, what are you doing?" she asked while she turned around to face me. She got me right there, what was I actually doing. I knew I liked to have her close. I felt extremely protective about her, and I just liked having her around to talk to and have fun with. She looked at me intently, before putting her arms around my neck to give me a hug. "I don't know for sure. But I do know I like it." I admitted, while she let out a giggle. "Yeah right. Do you know I felt your presence when you sneaked into my room?" she asked me, while I raised an eyebrow. "Why do you think I didn't jump, when you put your arms around my waist the first time?" she asked, while my eyes widened. "I need to come up with some new ideas to make you jump." I teased, while she grinned. "I felt safe, when you held me like that." she whispered out of the blue, and I just stared at her while she traced one of my tattoos with her finger. I took her hand to stop her and put it back where it was before, while she smirked at me. She let go of me but kept looking me in the eye, I kissed her on her forehead and let go of her. I watched her as she walked out of the room, probably to get something to drink, as I plopped down on the bed.

This wasn't supposed to happen, we got more and more intimate and I wondered what the hell I was doing. Maybe the intimacy would cool down, when I got back to my own home after the weekend. _Of course it won't cool down_ an annoying voice in my head told me. I was startled out of my musings when I felt something on top of me when I looked up I saw it was her. Of course my body found it necessary to betray me when I saw her like that and her eyes widened when she noticed the betrayal of my body. Before I knew it she was off me and sat down a little further away from me. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to tickle you actually." she whispered quietly. "But you looked so peacefull I decided against it, I was just about to get up when you know looked at me and well… you know what I mean. It wasn't my intention to let that happen." she whispered so soft I barely heard her. I decided to sit up and scooted over to her. "Don't worry about it." I said with I smile, while I started to tickle her to get her to laugh a little. Of course she started laughing and tried to reach my sides to tickle me, even though I could handle it, I let her be. I hovered above her while she tried to stop laughing, and I just looked at her. "What?" she asked chuckling, while she looked at me. "Um…" I started, while she kept looking at me I locked my eyes with hers. "Just enjoyed watching you laugh." I waved it off quickly, while I stopped hovering above her and slumped back on the bed. I heard a sigh, and looked up. "El, just tell me the truth. I know it wasn't just watching me laugh." she said while she turned her head toward me. "Okay, okay I give up. I was taking in your beauty." I admitted, while her eyes widened. "Well, if we're going to honest to each other, there's something I have to admit too. I wasn't planning on tickling you when I was on top of you. But I still had no intention to give your body the reaction it gave." she admitted, while my jaw dropped and I started wondering why she got on top of me. "I just wanted to admire your torso from another angle." she suddenly whispered in my ear and gave me a small kiss on my cheek.

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 **CPOV**

 _What the hell am I doing?_ I thought, while I looked at my long time best friend and partner at work. "You liked what you saw from that angle?" he teased me, while I felt my cheeks turning red and I nodded, but immediately smacked myself on the forehead mentally. I suddenly felt his index finger under my chin and pushing it up softly so I would look him in the eye. And before I knew it he kissed me softly on the lips a kiss that deepened into a passionate one. When we both realized what was happening we both pulled back, and just looked at each other. Now I knew for sure it wasn't just due to the fact we spend so much time together just the two of us it was more than that, and for the moment I couldn't care less if it was wrong or not. I kissed him once more, while he pulled me on top of him while his hands were all over my body. Our actions became more passionate and before we both knew it we were naked and pleasured each other before we got hot and heavy, multiple times that night. After a couple of hours of pleasure we fell asleep in each others arms satisfied.

I woke up early, remembering last night and just couldn't stop smiling. When I looked up he was smiling at me. "Good morning sunshine, did you sleep well?" he asked, and I nodded. "Good morning, Tiger. How did you sleep?" I asked, and kissed the tattoo on his chest. "I finally slept fine, for once. That couch, is hell for your back, you know." he replied, and rolled us over so he was hovering over me, I put my arms around his neck and smiled at him, before he crashed his lips into mine, kissing me passionately which I of course returned equally automatically I put my legs around his waist and we got another round of passion and pleasure. Panting we slumped back onto the bed and just laid like that for a while. "I need a shower, to wake up a little bit more. Want to join me?" I asked, and he just followed me into the bathroom where we enjoyed each others company and showered. When we were done showering we dried and got dressed. Before I got into the kitchen Elliot had already started breakfast. "Smells good, what are you making?" I asked, while I sat down at the kitchen bar. "Pancakes." he replied, and turned around with a smile. I could see in his eyes he wanted me to come closer so I got up of my stool and walked over and hopped on the countertop. "Close enough?" I asked smirking while he had a puzzled look on his face. "I could see it in your eyes." I shrugged, while he smiled and came over to me to give me a kiss. "You know, as much as I like you kissing me, I think you should keep your mind at your pancakes before they burn." I said with a chuckle, and he seemed to get out of his trance and turned back to the pancakes. When the pancakes were ready he set the kitchen bar before picking me up and carrying me to the kitchen bar. "El, I can walk by myself you know." I giggled, while he nodded. "I know, but it I wanted to." he replied shrugging before he put me down on the stool and sat down next to me and started eating our breakfast in silence. When we were done I picked up the dishes and filled the sink with water to do the dishes. "You're awfully quiet El. Something wrong?" I asked, not noticing he was right behind me until he slipped his arms around my waist and kissed my neck. "I could ask you the same, you're pretty quiet yourself." he returned my question. "Just thinking about what's happening right now and last night." I answered, with a smile while I was finishing up the dishes. I turned around in his arms and smiled up at him. "What do you mean, thinking about what's happening now and last night?" he asked and I sighed.

"I'm just trying to figure out what it was, that made all of this happen. Don't get me wrong I don't regret anything." I assured him with a smile and he nodded. "I think we're on the same page with our thoughts." he replied and gave me a kiss. "Just so you know, I have no regrets about last night and earlier this morning." he whispered in my ear and I shivered. I was still trying to figure out what had changed between us, but I couldn't think of anything except for the fact he was staying here for a couple of days in a row, and that the tension between us got higher which made us become more intimate which each other, but a small voice in my head told me that wasn't the case here. I turned away and started to walk into the living room, and plopped down on the couch, still thinking.

 **N/A: I hope you like the first chapter! Let me know what you think by using that beautiful review button, thanks.**


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